Parenting Perspective 

When a parent apologises to their child, the specific language they choose can either reinforce a sense of hierarchy or model true humility. The goal is to show your child that saying sorry is not a sign of weakness, but is instead an expression of sincerity and fairness. Using humble and carefully chosen words makes the apology meaningful while also strengthening the trust between parent and child. 

Use Simple and Direct Language 

Keep your apology short, clear, and free of any excuses that might dilute its meaning. A simple, direct statement is always best. For example: 

• “I am sorry that I interrupted you. I should have listened properly.” 

This phrase shows clear accountability without attempting to shift any of the blame. 

Acknowledge the Impact of Your Actions 

It is important for children to hear that you recognise how your actions have affected them emotionally. You might say: 

• “I am sorry that I raised my voice. I can see that it made you feel upset.” 

This tells your child that their feelings are valid and have been seen, and that your apology is an act of care, not just a formality. 

Express a Commitment to Change 

A humble apology often includes a line that shows you are committed to improving your behaviour in the future. For example: 

• “I will try my best to handle it more calmly next time.” 

This simple addition reinforces the idea that an apology is not an empty gesture but is part of a genuine commitment to responsibility and growth. 

Reaffirm Your Love and Respect 

Remind your child that your apology comes from a place of love and a desire to maintain a healthy relationship with them: 

• “I am sorry for being unfair just now. I love you, and I want to do better for you.” 

This strengthens your connection and reassures them that a sincere apology always flows from a place of love and respect. By using words that admit fault, acknowledge feelings, commit to positive change, and express love, you effectively model humility. As a result, your child learns to see an apology not as a loss of authority, but as a powerful act of strength and care. 

Spiritual Insight 

Humility in speech is a central component of a noble Islamic character. When parents use humble words in their apologies, they are reflecting the core values of justice, sincerity, and mercy that Allah Almighty and the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught us to live by. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Luqman (31), Verses 19: 

‘“And be modest in your attitude and lower your voice (in dealing with people); as indeed, the harshest of all sounds, is the noise of the donkeys”.’ 

This verse reminds us that humility, expressed through both our tone and our choice of words, is a mark of wisdom and a beautiful character. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also taught that humility elevates a person, rather than diminishing them. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2588, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Charity does not in any way decrease wealth and Allah does not add to the servant who forgives but honour, and none humbles himself for Allah but Allah raises him in status.’ 

This teaches us that true humility does not lower a person’s status; on the contrary, it raises their honour in the sight of Allah Almighty. When parents apologise to their children using humble and sincere words, they demonstrate that real dignity comes from sincerity, not from pride. This helps children to learn that humility is a strength, and that saying sorry with love and respect strengthens both their family bonds and their faith.