We often resolve things silently and quickly. Should our child witness resolution too, or is silence enough? 

Parenting Perspective 

No, silence is rarely enough. Children cannot learn from what they cannot see. When arguments or periods of tension simply vanish without any visible resolution, a child is left to fill in the blanks, often with anxious questions. Did the problem just go away? Did one person have to suppress their feelings? Was the issue resolved through avoidance or through genuine understanding? While silence might appear to be a peaceful outcome, it frequently breeds confusion. A child might conclude that difficult emotions should be swallowed, or that closeness magically resumes without any effort or conversation. Over time, they may internalise the damaging idea that conflict is too unsafe to talk about, or that love means ignoring discomfort. 

What children require is not an invitation into adult conflicts, but a window into how adults repair them. There is no need to stage a dramatic performance of reconciliation. However, small, authentic cues are incredibly helpful. A warm sentence such as, “We had a disagreement earlier, but we have talked it through now,” or a simple moment of affection after the tension has passed can be very powerful. This demonstrates to your child that relationships are not broken by disagreements; on the contrary, they can be strengthened by resolution. It teaches them that emotions are not dangerous or shameful, and that true care includes the willingness to talk, listen, and reconnect. 

What Your Child Needs to Witness 

• That tension is acknowledged and addressed, not buried. 

• That emotional repair requires conscious effort, not just the passage of time. 

• That kindness and humility are essential for reconnecting after a conflict. 

• That true resolution involves both listening and expressing oneself. 

Even the briefest visible moments of repair provide a powerful and lasting model of how to love with emotional maturity. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam actively encourages islah (reconciliation), framing it not just as a virtue but as a profound social and spiritual responsibility. The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ was a master of this practice; he never left wounds unaddressed. He would mend hearts, clarify misunderstandings, and ensure that dignity was always restored, especially following a disagreement. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verses 10: 

‘…So, make peace with your brothers; and seek piety from Allah (Almighty) so that you may receive His Mercy. ‘

This divine command naturally extends to making peace within our own homes. It involves showing our children that the act of resolution is a component of mercy, not a sign of weakness. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4919, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Shall I not tell you about something more excellent in degree than fasting, prayer, and charity?’ They said: ‘Yes.’ He said: ‘It is putting things right between people. ‘

Let your child witness that love is defined not by the absence of conflict, but by the presence of repair. This is how true trust, security, and emotional wisdom are passed from one generation to the next: not through silence, but through gentle and consistent acts of restoration.