If one parent keeps overriding the other, could the child start seeing parenting as a power game? 

Parenting Perspective 

Yes, absolutely. If one parent frequently overrides the other in front of the child, it can transform the child’s perception of parenting from a united source of guidance into a power dynamic to be observed, tested, or even manipulated. Children are incredibly perceptive. When they see one parent’s rules being dismissed or reversed by the other, they begin to view parenting not as a cooperative effort grounded in love, but as a contest for control. This can lead them to favour the parent who seems more powerful, appeal to the more lenient one, or actively pit one against the other to get what they want. This dynamic damages more than just discipline; it erodes a child’s ability to trust boundaries and feel emotionally secure. Furthermore, it can deeply undermine the confidence of the parent who is repeatedly being overridden. 

Teaching children that parenting is about unity, not dominance 

The antidote to this is quiet consistency and profound mutual respect. Even when you disagree, you must commit to pausing the conversation until you can discuss it privately. Once a decision has been made in front of your child, avoid reversing it on the spot. Instead, use unifying language like, “Let us talk about this and get back to you together.” This models teamwork and shows your child that parenting is a partnership, not a contest. It teaches them that love and boundaries are not competing forces, but two parts of the same supportive structure. When both parents consciously reinforce each other’s roles, the child learns to respect both voices, not just the one that is louder or more lenient. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islamic teachings frame leadership in the home as a shared trust (amanah), not as a struggle for dominance. When one parent consistently overrides the other, it disrupts the delicate balance of rahmah (mercy), hikmah (wisdom), and ‘adl (justice) that a Muslim home should uphold. Publicly cancelling your spouse’s decision, regardless of your intentions, sends a damaging message not only to your child but also to the unseen world. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 103: 

‘And hold firmly to the rope of Allah (Almighty) collectively and do not be divided… ‘

This verse is a powerful call to unity for all believers, a call that echoes most intimately within the family unit. Division between parents can fracture the very harmony that children rely upon for their emotional and spiritual growth. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 5188, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Everyone of you is a guardian and everyone of you is responsible (for his wards). ‘

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ never competed with others to assert his authority. He led with compassion, clarity, and cooperation, providing the ultimate model for both parents to emulate. When children see their parents honouring each other’s decisions, deferring when appropriate, and offering correction only in private, they learn that leadership is not about power. They learn that it is about trust, humility, and working together for the good of the family. That is a lesson that will stay with them long after the specific household rules have been forgotten.