I worry our child sees our busyness as normal and thinks parenting is just management. How do we bring warmth back? 

Parenting Perspective 

In the rush of managing schedules and responsibilities, it is easy for parenting to become functional instead of relational. Children, however, thrive on emotional connection, not just efficiency. Reintroducing warmth does not require more time, but more intention. 

Slow Down Your Daily Interactions 

The first step is to soften the “how” of your daily commands. Instead of simply saying, ‘Brush your teeth now,’ try a gentler tone and add a touch of connection: ‘Come, let us get you ready for bed’. Warm eye contact and a soft tone can transform a routine task into a moment of care, reminding your child that they matter more than the to-do list. 

Reclaim Moments for Connection 

Intentionally carve out just a few minutes each day for a non-task-related check-in. Ask open-ended questions that invite sharing, such as, ‘What was the best part of your day today?’ or ‘Tell me something that made you laugh’. These brief but focused conversations create a powerful emotional imprint and show you are interested in their inner world. 

Reintroduce Spontaneous Affection and Play 

Look for small opportunities to be playful. This could be a spontaneous hug before they leave for school, a silly dance while tidying up, or simply a shared joke. These moments of unprompted joy and affection are the threads that weave a strong and loving bond, reminding them that your relationship is not just about rules and routines. 

Share Your Heart and Intentions 

Be honest with your child in an age-appropriate way. You can say, ‘I know I have been very busy with work lately, but I want you to always know that being your parent is the most important job I have’. Vocalising your love reassures them that underneath the busyness, your heart is with them. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, parenting is not just about management; it is a sacred trust that should be fulfilled with rahmah—a divine mercy that is reflected in our warmth and presence. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Anbiya (21), Verse 107: 

‘And We have not sent you, [O Muhammad], except as a mercy to the worlds…‘ 

This verse reminds us that the defining characteristic of our beloved Prophet Muhammad ﷺ was his mercy. If mercy was the core of his leadership, then it must also be at the heart of our parenting. This shifts our focus from simply managing our children to being a source of mercy for them. 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ made this mercy a condition of belonging to his community. 

It is recorded in Jami at-Tirmidhi, 1921, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He is not one of us who does not show mercy to our young and honour to our elders.‘ 

This hadith teaches us that showing mercy is not an optional extra; it is a fundamental part of our identity as believers. When parents make a conscious effort to shift from a mode of management back to one of mercy and connection, they are not just improving their family life; they are embodying the very essence of their faith.