Parenting Perspective 

Validate Their Feelings, Guide Their Response 

It can be difficult for a child to accept an apology when they are still feeling hurt. The first step is to validate their feelings: ‘It is okay that you are still upset, but accepting their apology is a sign of kindness.’ Explain that forgiving someone does not mean they have to forget their feelings immediately. You can role-play respectful responses, such as, ‘Thank you for your apology,’ which allows them to be gracious while still acknowledging their own emotions. 

Encourage the Value of Forgiveness 

Gently remind your child that we all make mistakes, and just as we hope for forgiveness from others, we should also try to offer it. Praise them warmly when they accept an apology gracefully, even if you know they are still hurting inside: ‘It showed real strength when you forgave your friend just now.’ This reinforces the idea that forgiveness is a sign of a generous character and helps to build their emotional resilience. 

Forgiveness is a Gift to Themselves 

This balance teaches children that forgiveness is a gift both to themselves and to others, nurturing healthier relationships. It helps them to heal quicker, let go of grudges, and grow into compassionate individuals. 

Spiritual Insight 

Forgiveness Brings a Divine Reward 

Islam teaches that while seeking justice for a wrong is permissible, the act of forgiving and reconciling is a higher path that carries a special reward directly from Allah. This encourages us to choose mercy whenever possible. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Shuraa (42), Verse 40: 

‘And the outcome (of defending) against an evil, (could be the formation) of an evil similar to it; so therefore, whoever offers amnesty and reconciliation, then his reward shall be with Allah (Almighty)…’ 

Forgiveness Increases a Person in Honour 

The prophetic tradition teaches that forgiveness does not diminish a person, but rather elevates them. Allah increases the honour and dignity of the one who forgives, making it a true sign of strength and high status. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, 2588, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Charity does not decrease wealth, no one forgives except that Allah increases him in honour, and no one humbles himself for the sake of Allah except that Allah raises him in status.’ 

A Source of Strength and Mercy 

When you teach your child that accepting an apology is both an act of social grace and a profound Islamic virtue, they begin to see forgiveness as a source of strength, not weakness. Over time, this understanding helps them to let go of grudges more easily and to grow into compassionate believers who embody mercy.