Parenting Perspective 

As a parent, it is important to show your child that asking for forgiveness is not a sign of weakness but rather an act of humility and strength. When you model the process of apologising, you teach your child the value of taking responsibility for their actions and the importance of maintaining healthy, respectful relationships. The act of seeking forgiveness should be presented as a natural and necessary part of being human, not something to be avoided or feared. 

Make Apologies a Natural Part of Life 

Ask for forgiveness in a way that shows it is a normal part of everyday life. Demonstrating that apologising is simply what we do when we have made a mistake, whether big or small, normalises the act for your child. It becomes a healthy tool they can use in their own relationships. 

You could say: ‘I did not handle that well. I am sorry for how I reacted, and I will work on doing better next time.’ 

This shows your child that mistakes happen, but it is our response to them that truly matters. 

Model Full Accountability 

When you apologise, make sure you take full responsibility for your actions. Avoid making excuses or deflecting blame, as this helps your child understand that accountability is a vital part of mending any relationship. 

You might say: ‘I should have been more patient with you, and I am truly sorry for not being more understanding.’ 

This statement clearly identifies your role in the situation, showing your child that taking responsibility is a key part of personal growth. 

Reaffirm Your Commitment to the Relationship 

After asking for forgiveness, reaffirm your commitment to doing better. This helps your child feel secure and reinforces that the relationship is more important than any mistake. Your sincerity will make the apology even more powerful. 

You can tell them: ‘I care about you, and I will keep trying to be better for you.’ 

This reassures them that your apology is not just about a single incident but about your ongoing commitment to a loving, healthy relationship. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, seeking forgiveness is a natural and necessary part of self-growth, humility, and maintaining strong relationships. Teaching your child how to ask for forgiveness is not just about mending worldly connections but also about fostering their spiritual development.  

The Quran’s Teaching on Humility in Repentance 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Aa’raaf (7), Verse 199: 

‘(O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) adopt a forgiving approach, and encourage (the doing of) positive (moral) actions, and disregard those who are imbued in their ignorance.’ 

This verse beautifully captures the posture of maturity: forgive, seek forgiveness, and move on peacefully. When parents demonstrate this, they mirror divine instruction showing that righteousness isn’t perfection but humility in correction. 

True Strength Lies in Self-Control 

The teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ link true strength to the ability to control one’s emotions. This self-control is the foundation that makes a sincere apology possible. 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 1317, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong person is not the one who overpowers others, but the one who controls himself when he is angry.’ 

This hadith highlights that managing our reactions is a sign of strength. By modelling self-control and then asking for forgiveness when we fall short, you teach your child a key part of their faith and encourage them always to strive for better.