Parenting Perspective 

Apologising in front of your children can be a very powerful act. It shows them that adults also make mistakes and that respect can be restored through humility. However, sharing too many details about the argument can confuse or burden a child. The key is to model accountability in a way that reassures your children without dragging them into the problem. 

Keep It Short and Simple 

A brief and sincere apology is all that is needed. A phrase like, ‘I am sorry I raised my voice earlier’ is enough. There is no need to explain all the reasons behind the disagreement, as this can be confusing for a child. 

Use a Respectful Tone 

Show genuine warmth in your voice and body language. Children learn just as much from your delivery and tone as they do from your words. A sincere tone shows them that the apology is heartfelt. 

Avoid Blame or Justifications 

A true apology takes responsibility. It is better to say, ‘I should not have spoken like that’ rather than, ‘I only did that because you…’. This prevents the conflict from re-opening in front of your child. 

Reassure the Children 

After the apology, it is important to add a line of reassurance for your child. Saying something like, ‘Mum and Dad love each other, and we have sorted it out’ helps them to feel safe and stops them from worrying. 

Continue the Discussion Privately 

Save the deeper conversation about the disagreement for when you and your spouse are alone. Your children need to see the resolution, not the raw details of the conflict. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam elevates the acts of apologising and reconciling to the level of true strength. Humbling oneself before another does not reduce one’s dignity; rather, it increases it. When parents demonstrate this behaviour in front of their children, they are planting the beautiful seeds of humility and forgiveness in their young hearts. 

A Quranic Reminder on Forgiveness 

The Quran commands us to be people of forgiveness and to overlook the faults of others, as this is a way to soften hearts and heal relationships. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Aa’raaf (7), Verse 199: 

‘ (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) adopt a forgiving approach, and encourage (the doing of) positive (moral) actions), and disregard those who are imbued in their ignorance.‘ 

This reminds us that forgiveness is a divine command that brings goodness to a family. 

The Prophetic Teaching on Humility 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that humbling oneself for the sake of Allah and for the sake of peace is an act that brings a person greater honour, not shame. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2588, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Charity does not decrease wealth, no one forgives except that Allah increases him in honour, and no one humbles himself for the sake of Allah except that Allah raises him in status.’ 

This teaches us that a humble apology increases one’s honour in the sight of Allah. 

By apologising briefly and respectfully in front of your children, you are modelling the core Islamic values of humility, forgiveness, and dignity. They learn from your example that making amends is a part of love, and that protecting relationships with gentleness is a strength that Allah loves.