Parenting Perspective 

Being excluded from a social event can sting deeply, especially when a child sees photos and posts of their friends enjoying something to which they were not invited. The combination of rejection and the public nature of social media can intensify the hurt, leading to self-doubt, loneliness, or even resentment. Parents can support their children through this by balancing a validation of their feelings with gentle guidance on how to handle such disappointments. 

Acknowledge Their Pain Without Rushing to Fix It 

It is important to start by validating their hurt. You could say, ‘I can see this feels very painful; anyone would feel upset about being left out.’ It is best to avoid minimising their feelings with lines like, ‘Do not worry, it does not matter.’ Simple acknowledgement helps children to feel seen, which is often what they need most in that initial moment of pain. 

Encourage Healthy Engagement with Social Media 

Explain to your child that social media can often magnify feelings of exclusion because it shows only the highlights of an event, not the full story. Encourage them to limit their scrolling when they are feeling raw and to instead redirect their energy towards activities that can restore a sense of balance, such as going outside, journalling, or spending time with supportive family members. 

Reframe the Exclusion to Protect Their Self-Worth 

Remind your child that this one event does not in any way measure their value as a person. You can share with them that friendships can ebb and flow, and that sometimes being excluded is a reflection of other people’s social dynamics, not a comment on their character. This helps to shift their focus from ‘What is wrong with me?’ to ‘This experience does not define me.’ 

Encourage Them to Nurture Other Connections 

You can gently guide them towards reaching out to other friends or family members to plan something positive of their own. This prevents them from dwelling solely on what they have missed out on and helps them to realise that a sense of inclusion and joy can be created in many different spaces. 

Through consistent and gentle parental guidance, children can learn that being left out, while painful, does not diminish their value. They can learn that resilience is built through perspective, self-compassion, and an active redirection of their energy. 

Spiritual Insight 

In the Islamic tradition, believers are encouraged to meet moments of social hurt with patience, to guard their hearts against destructive emotions like envy, and to find their ultimate sense of worth in their relationship with God. 

The Quranic Counsel on Overcoming Grief 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 139: 

‘And do not weaken (seeing the strength of the opposition), and do not grieve (for those who have passed away as martyrs); and ultimately you will prevail, if you are (true) believers.’ 

This verse reminds us that moments of hurt or social exclusion are not permanent defeats. Our true strength and sense of superiority come from maintaining our faith and our self-worth in the sight of Allah. 

The Prophetic Warning Against Envy 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 4210, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Beware of envy, for indeed envy consumes good deeds just as fire consumes wood.’ 

This hadith teaches us that while it is natural to feel hurt when we are left out, allowing that hurt to turn into envy or resentment is something that harms our own peace and spiritual well-being. Instead, we are called to protect our hearts with patience and gratitude. 

When parents guide their children to balance their natural emotions with this spiritual awareness, children can learn that their ultimate worth is not measured by social invitations or online posts, but by their relationship with Allah Almighty. Over time, this understanding gives them the strength to navigate the pain of exclusion with dignity, to focus on their own unique blessings, and to find their security in being valued by the One who matters most.