What if my in-laws do not believe in SEN? 

Parenting Perspective 

Understanding the Disbelief 

When in-laws do not accept or understand your child’s special educational needs (SEN), it can feel lonely and frustrating. Remember that disbelief often comes from lack of knowledge, fear of stigma, or cultural misunderstandings, not from a lack of love. Try to approach the topic with patience rather than confrontation. 

Sharing Simple Facts and Practical Strategies 

Start by sharing clear, simple facts about your child’s needs. Use everyday examples instead of medical jargon: ‘He needs more time to answer questions’ or ‘She feels overwhelmed by noise.’ Show them practical strategies you use, short instructions, calm tone, routines, so they see the difference these make. 

Inviting Observation and Sharing Progress 

Invite them to observe therapy sessions or school meetings if possible. This helps them hear information from professionals, which can feel more reassuring than only hearing it from you. Share small progress moments too, showing how support is helping can soften disbelief. 

Staying Calm and Setting Boundaries 

Stay calm if they say things that hurt. Correct misconceptions gently: ‘It is not bad parenting, his brain just works differently, so we help him in other ways.’ Keep your spouse involved so you feel supported as a team. If your in-laws remain dismissive, set kind but firm boundaries about what you will and will not tolerate in your child’s presence. Protect your child’s confidence above all. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam reminds us that every family member is part of our Amanah, our trust from Allah Almighty. When we seek to guide them with patience and kindness, we are fulfilling this trust. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nahl (16), Verse 125: 

‘Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction… ‘

This Ayah is a gentle reminder that guidance works best with wisdom, patience, and calm speech. 

Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ faced people who denied truths he brought, yet he remained patient and steadfast. It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1828, that holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘Allah is not kind to him who is not kind to people. ‘

Your effort to explain your child’s needs with respect is an act of kindness, even when it is not fully received. 

Make Dua for your in-laws: O Allah Almighty, open their hearts to understanding and compassion. Teach your child to show respect but shield them from unhelpful comments. If a situation becomes too tense, it is your right to protect your child’s peace, without severing ties, but with wisdom. 

Your calm example, patient reminders, and quiet trust in Allah Almighty’s plan can soften hearts over time. Even if understanding does not come quickly, know that your effort is seen by Allah Almighty, and He rewards every moment of Sabr you show in caring for your child and your family ties.