Parenting Perspective 

Set Clear Expectations for Teamwork 

Making chores fair regardless of gender involves teaching your children that responsibilities in the household are shared equally. You can start by setting the expectation that everyone contributes to keeping the home clean and organised. You might say, ‘Everyone in this house, regardless of whether they are a boy or a girl, has a role in helping to keep things tidy. It is about teamwork and contributing to the family, not about what tasks are “for boys” or “for girls.”’ 

Assign Tasks Based on Ability, Not Gender 

Ensure that each child is given tasks that are suited to their abilities, rather than their gender. It is essential that chores are viewed as a collective responsibility, not as something specific to one gender. ‘Helping with chores is something we all do. The more we work together, the more we learn to appreciate each other and the efforts it takes to take care of our home.’ 

Praise Effort and Cooperation 

Finally, you should praise your children for their efforts in maintaining a clean home and in working together as a team. For example, ‘I am so proud of how well you all worked together to finish the chores. It is amazing how you help one another, regardless of what the task is.’ 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, fairness and cooperation are highly valued, especially within the family. Allah Almighty says in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 195: 

‘And expend (your wealth) in the pathway of Allah (Almighty), and do not let your actions place you in a (state of) destruction (by being miserly)…’ 

This verse teaches us that we should all contribute to the well-being of our family and our community, whether it is through financial support, emotional care, or sharing responsibilities like household chores. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also exemplified fairness and teamwork within the family. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 3587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families.’ 

This Hadith reinforces the importance of sharing responsibilities fairly within the family, regardless of gender. By teaching your children to share household chores equally, you are instilling in them these Islamic values of cooperation, fairness, and mutual respect.