How can I normalise that it is okay to not love every traditional dish? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is a completely normal and healthy part of a child’s development to form their own unique preferences, even within the context of their family’s traditional cuisine. The parental goal should not be to force a child to love every single dish, but to teach them how to express their preferences with respect and to appreciate their heritage without feeling rigid pressure. Normalising this distinction is key to a positive long-term relationship with their cultural identity. 

Separate Personal Taste from Cultural Respect 

The most important first step is to create an emotional safe space for your child to be honest about their tastes. If a child fears that disliking a traditional food will be seen as a betrayal of their family or culture, they may either hide their feelings or develop a deeper resentment. 

Make a clear distinction between personal taste and cultural respect. You can say, ‘It is absolutely okay for this not to be your favourite dish. You do not have to love everything, but it is important that we always appreciate the love and the history behind the food our family makes’. Avoid using phrases that equate liking with loyalty, such as, ‘You should like this because it is our food’. Instead, use language that separates the two: ‘You do not have to love the taste, but we must always honour the tradition’.  

Turn Dislike into a Learning Opportunity 

When your child expresses a dislike for a dish, treat it as a curious learning opportunity rather than a moment of rejection. Ask gentle, non-judgmental questions to understand their experience better. You could ask, ‘What was it about the dish that you did not enjoy so much?’ Often, the issue is not the entire dish but a specific texture, a strong spice, or a particular smell. 

Once you understand the reason, you can involve them in making small, creative adaptations. This might involve reducing a certain spice, adding a squeeze of lemon to brighten the flavour, or blending a chunky stew into a smoother soup. This collaborative approach keeps them connected to the food instead of rejecting it entirely. You can also normalise their feelings by sharing stories of different preferences within your own family: ‘You know, your grandfather absolutely loved this dish, but your aunt was never very fond of it either! Everyone’s tastes are a little different’. This shows them that having a unique preference does not mean they are disrespecting the family. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches a balanced and gentle approach to life, and this includes our relationship with food. Our faith does not demand that we love the taste of every permissible thing, but it does demand that we show gratitude and good manners for all of Allah’s blessings. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ma’idah (5), Verse 88: 

‘And eat of what Allah has provided for you [which is] lawful and good, and fear Allah in whom you are believers…’ 

This verse guides our focus to what truly matters. The primary criteria for our food are that it should be halalan tayyiban—lawful and good. Our personal preference is secondary to this. Teach your child that the greatest blessing is that the food on their plate is permissible and wholesome. Whether or not it is their favourite is a minor detail. Our first duty is to be grateful that the food meets these divine criteria. When this is the focus, the question shifts from, ‘Do I like this?’ to ‘Is this a blessing from Allah for which I should be thankful?’. This perspective teaches them to respect all food as a provision from their Lord. 

It is recorded in  Sahih Muslim,Hadith 2064, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ:  

‘…never found fault with food. If he liked it, he ate it, and if he disliked it, he left it.’ 

This hadith provides the most perfect and gentle model for how to behave when faced with a food one does not prefer. The Prophet ﷺ, with his perfect character, did not feel the need to announce his dislike or find fault with the dish. His silence was a form of profound adab (good manners), showing the utmost respect for the blessing of the food and for the feelings of the person who had prepared it.