What should I do if my child is bystanding during bullying?
Parenting Perspective
Explain the Role of a Bystander
When your child is a bystander during bullying, it is important to address the issue and to help them understand the role they can play in stopping it. You can start by discussing the concept of bystanding and explaining that when someone is being bullied, it is not enough to just watch; they have a responsibility to help in a positive way. For example, you might say, ‘When you see someone being hurt, you can help by either speaking up or getting an adult to intervene.’
Teach Empathy and Offer Support
Encourage your child to show empathy and kindness towards the person being bullied. You can teach them that standing by and doing nothing can sometimes make the situation worse. Guide your child to understand that they have the power to make a difference. You could say, ‘If you do not feel comfortable speaking to the bully directly, you can tell a teacher or help the person who is being bullied by offering them your support.’
Practice and Reinforce
It is important to role-play different scenarios with your child so they can feel more confident in taking action when they witness bullying. For example, you might practise saying, ‘Stop that! It is not nice to treat people like that,’ in a calm but firm voice. Praise your child when they show courage in standing up for others, even in small ways. This reinforces the idea that by standing up against bullying, they are making a positive impact and are fostering a safer environment for everyone.
Spiritual Insight
In Islam, standing up against injustice and helping those in need is a fundamental part of being a good believer. Allah Almighty commands us in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 2:
‘This is a Book (Quran) in which there cannot be any doubt; guidance for those who seek piety.’
This verse highlights that the Quran provides guidance for addressing injustice and for standing up for what is right.
The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also taught the importance of standing up for others. It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 3587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:
‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families.’
This Hadith serves as a reminder that standing up for others, especially when they are vulnerable, is an act of kindness and righteousness. By teaching your child to act against bullying and to support others, you are guiding them to follow the example of the Prophet ﷺ, promoting justice, kindness, and compassion in all their interactions.