Parenting Perspective 

When children resist hygiene habits like using deodorant or taking regular showers, it is rarely an act of defiance. The resistance usually stems from discomfort, sensory overwhelm, or embarrassment. Strong smells, unfamiliar textures, or even the idea of being forced into a routine can make these tasks feel unpleasant. The aim is not to shame them into cleanliness but to build a calm and respectful routine that helps hygiene feel normal and manageable. Start by identifying the true barrier. Does the scent of the soap bother them, is it the water temperature, or perhaps the loss of privacy? Once you understand the reason, your approach can shift from confrontation to collaboration. 

Start Small and Offer Choices 

If your child dreads showers, begin with short, predictable sessions. Use phrases like, ‘Let us start with a quick refresh; just five minutes, not a full wash.’ You can build the duration gradually over time. Offer them choices to restore their sense of autonomy, which can lower resistance. For example, they could choose to shower in the morning or after dinner, or select between different types of soap. For deodorant, you could start with unscented or natural roll-ons. Demonstrate how to use it by calmly applying your own and saying, ‘This helps us to stay fresh and confident.’ Avoid lectures about smell, as embarrassment can block learning. Frame it as a normal part of daily maturity, not a punishment for being ‘dirty’. 

Use Routines, Not Reminders 

Children thrive on predictability. Attach hygiene habits to fixed anchors in their day, such as after sports, before bed, or right after school. You could post a simple checklist in the bathroom to serve as a visual cue, which reduces the need for nagging and increases their sense of ownership. 

• Change of clothes ready 

• Wash body and hair 

• Apply deodorant 

• Recite dua 

Keep all necessary items within easy reach, including a clean towel, soap, deodorant, and fresh clothes. When the setup is organised, the task feels lighter. A consistent rhythm teaches that cleanliness is as routine as brushing teeth, not a special event that requires a debate. 

Teach Through Meaning and Example 

Children often mirror what they see. When they watch you care for your body calmly, without rush or irritation, they absorb that positive attitude. Talk about hygiene as a form of self-respect: ‘Allah has given us our bodies as a trust, so we look after them.’ Connect the feeling of freshness to comfort, confidence, and spiritual purity. For older children, you can explain how cleanliness affects friendships, their ability to perform Salah, and their overall confidence. Keep the tone factual and gentle, avoiding any link between body odour and feelings of shame or disgust. Instead, emphasise dignity: ‘We care for ourselves because we respect what Allah Almighty has given us.’ 

Add Comfort and Positive Reinforcement 

If sensory issues are the root cause, adjust the experience to make it more comfortable. This could involve using softer towels, mild scents, a stable water temperature, or gentle sponges. Make the bathroom an inviting space with warm light, a clean layout, and perhaps some soft nasheed music in the background. After each shower, praise their independence by saying, ‘You did that completely on your own today.’ This reinforcement should highlight their growth and maturity. Gradually, the routine will become less about enforcement and more about self-pride. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 222: 

‘“…Indeed, Allah (Almighty) loves those who repent excessively and those who adore their personal purification”.’ 

Cleanliness in Islam is an act of faith, not vanity. Every shower, wash, or application of deodorant can be reframed as a form of worship: caring for the body that Allah Almighty has entrusted to us. Teaching this connection helps a child to see hygiene as a way to achieve both spiritual and emotional balance by cleansing the body and refreshing the soul. When parents model this link gently, cleanliness becomes an honour, not a burden. 

It is recorded in Riyadh Al Saliheen, Hadith 1031, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Purification is half of faith.’ 

This hadith transforms hygiene from a daily struggle into a sacred rhythm. Regular washing, wearing fresh clothing, and maintaining a pleasant scent all reflect a believer’s inner respect for the gifts of Allah Almighty. You can tell your child: ‘Every time you clean yourself, you are practising a part of your faith.’ Linking showers and deodorant to ibadah elevates their meaning. Gradually, your child will stop viewing hygiene as something to avoid and start seeing it as a way to honour their faith, confidence, and maturity, approaching it with peace instead of protest.