What signals might show that my child is hiding feelings because they assume I am ‘too busy’? 

Parenting Perspective 

When children perceive their parents as consistently busy, they often stop trying to share their feelings openly. This change can be gradual, but it is usually detectable through a pattern of subtle behavioural shifts. 

Watch for These Subtle Changes 

• Shortened emotional sharing: Answers to your questions may become brief and lacking in detail, as your child may no longer expect an engaged follow-up. 

• Delayed or poorly timed disclosures: They might wait until you are clearly distracted or just about to leave the room to mention something important. 

• Turning elsewhere for support: You may notice them confiding more in friends, siblings, or online communities instead of coming to you. 

• Self-dismissing language: They may start using phrases like, ‘It is fine, you are busy’, which shows they have already accepted your unavailability as a given. 

Recognising these patterns early is the key to intervening and gently re-establishing a culture of emotional openness in your home. 

Spiritual Insight 

Our children have a fundamental right to our time and attention. Fulfilling this amanah (trust) from Allah means ensuring they always feel that our focus and care are accessible to them. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Ash Shua’raa (26), Verse 214: 

‘O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ by) cautioning your closest relatives…‘ 

This command reminds us that our primary duty of care begins with those closest to us. This includes being attuned and responsive to the spiritual and emotional needs of our immediate family. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1829, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Every one of you is a shepherd and every one of you will be asked about his flock.’ 

This powerful metaphor teaches us that we are all guardians, and we will be held accountable for those under our care. Being emotionally present for our children is a core part of this great responsibility. 

By making a conscious effort to respond to even the smallest bids for your attention, you send a powerful message to your child: that their feelings are always welcome and important, no matter how busy life gets.