Parenting Perspective 

Have an Open Conversation 

When a child copies negative habits from their peers, it is essential to address the issue with understanding and guidance.¹ Children are influenced by those around them, and it is natural for them to mimic behaviours.² However, it is important to help your child recognise the difference between positive and negative actions and to guide them in making better choices. Start by having an open conversation with your child about the behaviour they are imitating. Ask them why they feel the need to copy their peers and listen to their perspective. 

Explain the Impact 

Once you have identified the negative behaviour, you can explain why it is not acceptable. For example, if your child starts using inappropriate language or showing disrespect, calmly explain how this can hurt others and lead to negative consequences. You could say, ‘Using hurtful words can damage relationships and make people feel bad. It is important to speak kindly to others.’ This helps your child to understand the impact of their actions and teaches them better ways of handling situations. 

Teach the Value of Individuality 

It is also important to teach your child the value of individuality. Encourage them to embrace their unique qualities and to make decisions based on their own values rather than simply following the crowd. You can provide your child with positive alternatives to the negative habits they may have picked up. For example, if they are imitating poor behaviour at school, encourage them to focus on activities that promote a positive character, like joining a sports team or pursuing a creative hobby. Praise your child when they make good choices, even if it is difficult to resist peer pressure. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, the influence of peers is recognised, and Allah Almighty advises us to choose our companions wisely. Allah states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Furqaan (25), Verse 27-28: 

‘And on the Day (of Judgement), those imbued in the darkness (of their ignorance and immorality) shall bite their hands, and shall say: “how I wish I had adopted the pathways taught to me by the Messenger. Woe be unto me, how I wish that I had not taken so-and-so as a friend.”’ 

This verse underscores the importance of choosing good company and the negative consequences of following bad influences. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also warned us about the impact of bad company. In Sahih Muslim, Hadith 3000a, the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘A person is upon the religion of his friend, so let one of you look at whom he takes as a friend.’ 

This Hadith teaches that the people we associate with can have a significant impact on our character and decisions. By guiding your child to make better choices and to avoid copying negative habits, you are helping them to live in accordance with Islamic teachings, choosing friends who will lead them towards righteousness and spiritual growth.