What is a fair match scheme when one child saves more than the other? 

Parenting Perspective 

When one child saves more than another, it can lead to feelings of unfairness, especially if siblings are aware of the differences. As a parent, it is important to recognise each child’s individual financial behaviour while ensuring both feel equally valued and motivated. The key is to approach the situation with fairness and encouragement, creating a system that rewards effort rather than comparing the total amounts each child saves. A fair match scheme should be designed to reward progress, not just totals. 

Acknowledge Different Savings Habits 

Start by acknowledging that each child has different saving habits, which is a personal choice based on their understanding of money. ‘I see that you are both saving in different ways, and that is okay. The goal is to learn and grow, not to keep up with each other’. This establishes that saving is not a competition but a personal responsibility, keeping the focus on individual growth. 

Introduce a Match Scheme Based on Effort 

To encourage both children and ensure fairness, introduce a matching scheme based on effort, not just the total amount saved. For example, ‘For every pound you actively set aside, I will match half of it. This way, both of you are rewarded for the effort you make’. This scheme rewards both children, helping them feel that their attempts to save are recognised, regardless of the final amount. It also teaches the principle that consistency is more important than comparison. 

Incorporate Personal Goals and Rewards 

Rather than simply matching amounts, tailor the scheme to each child’s personal goals. ‘If you are saving for a special item, let us create a goal we can work towards together. I will help you with a match based on your progress towards that goal’. This approach encourages children to save for something meaningful, rather than just for the sake of comparison, and helps them understand the value of working towards a personal target. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam encourages responsible money management, including saving. The concept of fairness in Islam is not about treating everyone identically but about giving each person what is right for them, based on their efforts. By fostering a culture of saving, parents can teach children the value of personal responsibility in line with Islamic teachings. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 261: 

‘The example of those who spend their wealth in the way of Allah is like that of a seed of grain that grows seven ears, each bearing one hundred grains.’ 

This verse underscores that small actions can lead to great rewards. While the verse refers to spending in charity, the principle of small, consistent efforts leading to growth is applicable. When children learn to save, they are practising the values of foresight and wisdom. By matching their savings, parents can help them understand the value of consistency and the importance of preparing for the future. 

It is recorded in Bulugh Al-Maram, Hadith 184, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Fear Allah and treat your children equally.’ 

This hadith highlights the importance of fairness in all dealings. A fair matching scheme reflects justice by rewarding each child according to their effort, rather than comparing them. Through this approach, parents teach their children that financial responsibility is rooted in fairness and consistency, principles that align with Islamic values. 

By introducing a matching scheme that focuses on effort and individual goals, parents can ensure both children feel valued and motivated to save, while also reinforcing the Islamic values of fairness and personal responsibility.