What emotional difference does it make when I affirm my child’s effort instead of just their success? 

Parenting Perspective 

Fostering a Growth Mindset 

Your child’s emotional foundation is nurtured when you acknowledge their effort rather than merely their accomplishments. Saying something like, You worked really hard on that, or You kept trying even though it was difficult, encourages children to believe that their value is independent of results. It teaches children that even in the face of setbacks, bravery, perseverance, and turning up are important. 

The Danger of Praising Only Success 

Children who exclusively receive praise for their accomplishments may begin to hide their errors or dread failure in order to keep the praise. This can weaken emotional safety over time. 

Building Resilience and Emotional Safety 

Children, on the other hand, feel more comfortable taking chances, seeking assistance, and trying again when their efforts are often acknowledged. They gain emotional stability and lose their fear of failing. You are demonstrating to children that love and support are consistent, trustworthy, and based on who they are becoming rather than just what they accomplish.

Spiritual Insight 

Islam values intention and striving over visible success. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ankaboot (29), Verse 69: 

‘And those people that endeavour (to please) Us (Allah Almighty); so, We (Allah Almighty) shall indeed guide them (to those pathways) that lead to Us…‘

It is recorded in Sunan an-Nasa’i, Hadith 3437, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Actions are but by intentions, and each man will have but that which he intended.‘

By encouraging effort, you are in line with divine principles and show your child that Allah Almighty loves honesty and hardship.