What are the early signs that suggest mainstream school might not be serving my child well? 

Parenting Perspective 

Observing Changes in Mood and Behaviour 

Many parents sense when something is not quite right at school, even if they cannot pinpoint exactly what is wrong. Early signs of a problem are not always obvious, your child may become unusually withdrawn, angry, or overtired in ways that do not match normal fatigue. You might notice that your child no longer asks curious questions, loses interest in schoolwork, or suddenly complains of headaches or stomach aches with no clear cause. Such physical complaints can be a child’s way of expressing distress before they have the words to explain it. Be alert to unusual mood swings, a sudden fear of going to school, or comments like, ‘Nobody understands me.’ 

Trusting Your Instincts 

Younger children may act out or regress, for example, returning to habits they had grown out of, while older children may become secretive or show a deep lack of interest in learning. Sometimes, the issue is not that the school itself is bad but that your child’s learning style, pace, or needs are not being met in a busy classroom. Trust your instincts; your observations matter. Stay open and gentle when talking with your child about what they enjoy and what worries them. Keep simple notes of patterns that concern you, this can help you decide whether an alternative like home-schooling might nurture your child’s strengths and restore their natural curiosity, InshaAllah. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, the wellbeing of a child is not just about physical safety but about protecting their mind and soul too. Allah Almighty honours each child’s individual fitrah — their natural state and reminds us to care for it wisely. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Isra (17), Verse 70: 

‘And indeed, We have honoured the children of Adam… ‘

This Ayah is a powerful reminder that your child deserves an environment that respects their dignity and supports their growth. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 2138, that holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘Every child is born upon the Fitrah… ‘

If mainstream schooling dampens that natural curiosity, joy, or sense of self-worth, then it may be time to explore other ways of learning. Choosing to make a change is not a sign of failure but of guardianship. You are not expected to shield your child from every hardship, but you are called to remove barriers that stifle their healthy development when you can. Seek Allah Almighty’s guidance through Istikhara and Dua, trust your parental instincts, and remember that every step you take to protect your child’s wellbeing is an act of Ibadah.