How do I explain feeling different from others without shame? 

Parenting Perspective 

Being Different is Not Being Less 

Many children notice when they feel different; perhaps they wear something others do not, speak a second language, or have different rules because of their faith or family values. Sometimes this awareness brings quiet pride, but often it can bring worry, embarrassment, or the desire to hide what makes them special. You can start by telling your child that being different does not mean they are less. Use gentle words: ‘The things that make you different are part of what makes you special.’ 

Talk Openly and Share Stories 

Talk openly about what your child feels sets them apart. Is it their name, the way they dress, or the way they pray or eat? Listen without judgement and praise them for sharing their honest thoughts. Share stories from your own moments of feeling different, and how you learned to stand tall with those differences. Use simple examples: ‘Just like a garden has many colours of flowers, Allah Almighty made people unique too.’ Remind your child that we do not have to change who we are to fit in; we can show kindness and confidence in what makes us, us. 

Practice and Praise 

Practise what they might say if someone points out their difference: ‘Yes, I do that because it is special to my family,’ or, ‘That is part of my faith.’ Praise any small moment when they speak about who they are with pride. Over time, your warm words will help them see that feeling different does not need to be accompanied by shame; it can be carried with calm strength. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam beautifully reminds us that our differences are not mistakes but are signs from Allah Almighty. He created us with different backgrounds, appearances, and traditions so that we might learn from one another. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 13: 

‘O mankind, indeed, We (Allah Almighty) have created you all from one man and one woman; and placed you amongst various nations and tribes for your introduction to each other….‘

Sharing this Ayah with your child teaches them that being different is part of Allah Almighty’s perfect plan. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 3372, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Dua is worship. ‘

Encourage your child to make a simple prayer when they feel shy about standing out: ‘Ya Allah, help me feel proud of who I am.’ These words remind them that their unique ways can be held with gratitude, not embarrassment. By connecting their differences back to their faith, your child will see that what makes them stand out is not a burden but a sign of Allah Almighty’s beautiful creativity, and that they can walk in any place with quiet dignity and hope.