Parenting Perspective 

Bedtime can be one of the most challenging moments for parents, especially when a toddler repeatedly tests the limits by asking for another glass of water or getting out of bed. At the end of a long day, exhaustion can make shouting feel like the only option, but it rarely helps. A calmer, more structured approach not only prevents shouting but also teaches your toddler that bedtime is a predictable and safe time. 

Create a Consistent Routine 

Toddlers respond best to clear and predictable patterns. Establishing a set order of events each night, such as bath time, pyjamas, a short story, a bedtime dua, and then lights out, signals to your child that bedtime is approaching and is non-negotiable. Repeating the same sequence every night reduces resistance because the steps become familiar and comforting. 

Use Calm, Short Reminders 

When your toddler gets out of bed for the tenth time, avoid the temptation to lecture them. Instead, use a simple and consistent phrase, such as, ‘It is bedtime now. Back to bed, please,’ as you gently guide them back. Repeating this same calm action and phrase consistently teaches them that the boundary will not change, no matter how many times they test it. 

Manage Your Own Triggers 

Be aware of the moments when your own frustration begins to build. When you feel it rising, take a deep breath, step out of the room for a brief moment, or make a conscious decision to lower your voice instead of raising it. This not only helps you to stay in control but also models emotional regulation for your child. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam values patience, calmness, and mercy in all aspects of parenting, especially during moments of exhaustion when shouting can feel like the easiest response. Just as Allah has set specific times for prayer and rest, parents are also entrusted with teaching their children the discipline of routine in a gentle and consistent manner. 

The Importance of Patience in Daily Routines 

The Quran reminds us that advising one another to patience is a defining characteristic of those who are successful in the sight of Allah. This applies profoundly to the daily routines of family life. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Asr (103), Verses 1–3: 

‘ By the (design of) time (by Allah Almighty); indeed, mankind shall surely (remain in a state of) deprivation (moral deficit), except for those people who are believers and undertake virtuous acts; and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and dissemination of) the truth and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and accomplishment of) resilience.‘ 

Strength in Self-Control and Perseverance 

The prophetic tradition teaches that true strength is not found in overpowering a child with anger, but in the self-control and perseverance a believer demonstrates when faced with a challenge. 

It is recorded in Bulugh Al Maram, Hadith 90, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, while there is good in both. Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not give up.’ 

By avoiding shouting and embracing calm consistency, you are reflecting the Islamic values of patience and mercy. Your toddler learns that your rules are steady but loving, and bedtime becomes an opportunity to instil both discipline and spiritual peace.