Parenting Perspective 

Redefine Real Strength 

Talking to your son about unhealthy ‘tough guy’ images involves helping him to understand that real strength comes from character, kindness, and resilience, not from physical dominance or emotional suppression. You can start by explaining that the media often presents a narrow and unrealistic view of what it means to be strong. You might say, ‘Sometimes, movies or social media show men who are tough and never show their emotions, but that is not what real strength is. Real strength comes from being kind, patient, and respectful.’ 

Encourage Emotional Expression 

Encourage your son to express his emotions and to talk about his feelings. You can teach him that showing vulnerability and being emotionally open are signs of courage, not of weakness. ‘It is okay to feel sad or frustrated sometimes. Being able to talk about your feelings and to handle them in a healthy way is a part of being strong.’ 

Focus on Responsibility and Respect 

Help your son to understand that being a man is not about fitting into an exaggerated image of toughness, but about being responsible, respectful, and honest. You can say, ‘Being strong means taking care of your family, helping others, and being respectful.’ Lastly, you can encourage him to look up to role models who demonstrate strength in positive ways by sharing stories of men in Islam, such as the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, strength is viewed as a quality of character, which includes patience, humility, and resilience, rather than physical dominance. Allah Almighty says in the noble Quran at Surah Al Aa’raaf (7), Verse 199: 

‘(O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) adopt a forgiving approach and encourage (the doing of) positive (moral actions), and disregard those who are imbued in their ignorance.’ 

This verse teaches us that real strength is not about aggression or force but about patience, forgiveness, and wisdom. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also exemplified true strength through his actions and his character. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 3587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families.’ 

This Hadith reinforces that strength comes from how we treat others and how we manage our emotions with patience and respect. By helping your son to understand that true strength is about kindness, emotional intelligence, and respect, you are guiding him to reflect these Islamic values in his life.