How can I model prophetic behaviour when my child angers me? 

Parenting Perspective 

Children pay close attention to how their parents handle frustration, often more than they heed verbal guidance. When a child shows anger, such as yelling, ignoring directions, or being defiant, it can quickly trigger a parent’s emotional reaction. However, times of provocation can serve as significant learning experiences. A parent’s composed and respectful behaviour during emotional challenges provides children with a practical example of how to manage their actions with grace. 

Demonstrate calm under pressure 

• Instead of responding with yelling or severity, pause and take a deep breath 

• Soften your tone and say: I feel upset, but I would like to communicate in a gentle manner 

• Physically reset, step back, wash your face, or adjust posture to signal calm 

Model emotional responsibility 

• Acknowledge behaviour calmly: You seemed upset, but I remained composed because I want us to communicate with respect 

• If you raise your voice, admit it: I lost my temper. I acknowledge that the approach taken was incorrect, and I apologise for that 

• This helps children understand self-regulation, accountability, and repair 

With repetition, your example becomes their framework for responding to strong emotions. Over time, they learn that kindness and self-discipline are more powerful than dominance or shouting. 

Spiritual Insight 

Allah Almighty uplifts restraint and pardon as qualities beloved to Him. In Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 134, He describes the people of Taqwa: 

‘Those (the believers are the ones) that spend (in the way of Allah Almighty) in times of abundance and hardship; they suppress their anger; and are forgiving to people; and Allah (Almighty) loves those who are benevolent. ‘

This verse directly connects emotional restraint with spiritual excellence, highlighting the virtue of choosing gentleness even when provoked. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6786, that the Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ: 

‘By Allah, he never took revenge for himself concerning any matter that was presented to him, but when Allah’s Limits were transgressed, he would take revenge for Allah’s Sake. ‘

This demonstrates that the Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ did not react out of personal offence or pride. Rather, his responses were rooted in principle. In his personal interactions, particularly with children, his kindness and gentleness were unmatched. He corrected behaviour with understanding and not with anger. 

Recite this Dua silently in moments of tension: 

‘O Allah, grant me the strength to speak with patience and guide my heart to follow the path of the Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. ‘

By modelling this Sunnah, you foster not only emotional discipline, but also a home rooted in spiritual dignity and mercy.