How can I help my child express thanks to grandparents and older relatives? 

Parenting Perspective 

Children often feel a sense of gratitude but may struggle to express it effectively, especially towards grandparents and older relatives. They might shy away, offer a brief mumble, or simply forget to say anything at all. Guiding them requires showing them simple yet sincere ways to combine words, tone, and gestures so that their appreciation is felt and understood. 

Teach Simple Phrases and Gestures 

Encourage your child to use clear and respectful language to express their thanks, such as, ‘JazakAllahu Khair, Grandma,’ or ‘Thank you so much, Nana, I really love this.’ Pairing these words with a warm gesture, such as a smile, a hug, or placing a hand on the chest, makes their expression of thanks feel sincere and heartfelt. 

Model and Practise at Home 

Demonstrate gratitude in your own interactions by openly thanking elders in front of your child: ‘Thank you, Abba, for your help with that today.’ You can then gently prompt your child to do the same, asking, ‘Would you like to say thank you to Grandma as well?’ Rehearsing these small but important moments at home will prepare them to act naturally in real family gatherings. 

Highlight the Impact of Gratitude 

Explain the emotional effect that their thanks can have. You could say, ‘When you thank Grandma, it makes her heart feel so happy and shows her that you truly value her love.’ By connecting the act of thanking someone to its positive emotional impact, your child learns that gratitude is a powerful way to strengthen family bonds. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places an immense value on the virtue of gratitude (shukr), particularly when it is directed towards parents and elders who provide us with love and care. 

Gratitude to Parents as Gratitude to Allah 

The Quran establishes a profound and direct link between being grateful to one’s parents and being grateful to Allah, elevating the act to a primary principle of faith. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Luqman (31), Verses 14: 

‘…(Thus O mankind) be grateful to Me (Allah Almighty) and to your parents, and to Me is (your ultimate) destination.’ 

Thanking People as a Form of Thanking Allah 

The prophetic tradition teaches that our gratitude to Allah is incomplete if we fail to show gratitude to the people through whom His blessings reach us. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4811, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘He who does not thank people, does not thank Allah.’ 

By guiding your child to thank their grandparents and relatives with sincerity, you are nurturing adab and gratitude as essential acts of faith. They will come to see that showing appreciation is not only polite but is a beautiful way of honouring both their family and Allah Almighty.