What should I do when a child rejects praise because they fear jinxing success? 

Parenting Perspective 

When a child rejects praise due to a fear of ‘jinxing’ their success, it often stems from anxiety about maintaining their performance. The goal is to gently guide them away from superstitious thinking and towards a healthier understanding of encouragement by reframing the praise, validating their feelings, and focusing on effort. 

Reassure and Reframe the Praise 

Gently reassure your child that your words are meant to honour their current effort, not to predict or influence the future. Explain that encouragement is a way to recognise their resilience and patience, rather than a superstitious act that tempts fate. This helps separate the acknowledgement of their hard work from the outcome. 

Focus on Effort, Not Outcome 

Shift your affirmations away from outcome-based praise, which can feel loaded with expectation. Instead, focus on the process by using descriptive language. For example, replace a statement like, ‘You are the best’, with an observation such as, ‘I noticed how calm you remained while solving that difficult problem.’ This approach makes your recognition a reflection of qualities within their control, which reduces performance pressure and dismantles superstitious beliefs. 

Validate Their Feelings 

Create a safe space for your child to share their discomfort without fear of dismissal. Validating their feelings by acknowledging their anxiety helps them feel understood and can reduce the power of their superstitious thoughts. When they feel heard, they can gradually learn that praise is a healthy and supportive part of their growth, not something that carries the weight of destiny. 

Spiritual Insight 

The core Islamic teaching to counter superstition is that no human word can jinx an outcome, as all success and failure rest solely in Allah’s decree. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 160: 

‘If you are the recipient of assistance from Allah (Almighty), then no one can prevail over you; and if He (Allah Almighty) forsakes you, then who is it that can assist you after Him; and (the true) believers place their absolute reliance upon Allah (Almighty)’ 

This powerful verse gently directs a child’s heart away from superstition and towards true reliance on Allah (Tawakkul). It teaches them that protection and success come only from Him, not from the presence or absence of praise. 

The Prophetic tradition reinforces this worldview by encouraging both effort and trust. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2664, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allah, and do not lose heart.’ 

This hadith teaches a balanced formula for success: strive earnestly, accept encouragement, and place ultimate reliance on Allah. By teaching this principle, you can help your child reframe praise not as a threat, but as a form of support on their journey. It reminds them that true protection comes not from avoiding kind words, but from maintaining gratitude and unwavering trust in Allah Almighty.