What is the best way to support a child’s tech talent without letting it undermine parental authority? 

Parenting Perspective 

Many children today develop impressive technology skills, sometimes far surpassing those of their parents. While it is important to nurture this talent, parents may rightly worry that it could lead to their child becoming dismissive of rules or parental authority. The healthiest approach is to actively encourage your child’s skill as a gift, while making it very clear that any talent must always be guided by discipline, humility, and the core values of the family. 

Celebrate the Skill as a Blessing 

Show genuine pride in your child’s abilities and frame their talent as a blessing from God. You could say: ‘Allah has given you a wonderful gift with technology, and we are so proud of how quickly you learn and understand it.’ This recognition strengthens confidence and helps to prevent feelings of resentment towards parental guidance. 

Pair Their Talent With Responsibility 

Gently remind your child that every skill brings with it an amanah (a trust or responsibility). You can say to them: ‘Being talented in this area means you have a duty to use that talent wisely, not just to show off or try to get around the rules.’ This approach links their talent to accountability, not entitlement. 

Set Clear Boundaries Despite Their Skill 

Even if a child is highly skilled with technology, the core household limits regarding screen time, online modesty, or safety protocols should remain non-negotiable for them. Make it clear that: ‘Your talent does not put you above the rules. The rules are here to protect everyone in our family, including you.’ 

Channel Their Talent Into Positive Outlets 

Encourage your child to pursue coding, graphic design, or other problem-solving projects where their digital skills can be used in a constructive and beneficial way. This shifts their focus from potential conflict over rules to positive growth and contribution, where their talent can truly shine. 

By affirming your child’s talent while keeping your family’s boundaries firm, you can teach them that their ability is a blessing that grows best under guidance, not when it is used to challenge authority. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that every gift we possess is a trust (amanah) from Allah Almighty, and therefore every talent must be used with both humility and a sense of responsibility. Technical knowledge and skill do not grant a person superiority if they are not accompanied by righteousness and good character. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Qasas (28), Verses 77: 

‘And seek (to discover) from what Allah (Almighty) has bestowed upon you for the abode in the Hereafter; and do not forget your (true) functionality in this world; and show favour (onto others) as Allah (Almighty) has shown favour upon you; and do not seek to spread (immoral) anarchy on the Earth; as indeed, Allah (Almighty) does not like those who spread (immoral) anarchy”.‘ 

This verse reminds us that all our blessings, including our unique talents and skills, should be directed towards doing good and seeking success in the Hereafter, not towards causing harm or behaving with arrogance. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, 2664, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, while there is good in both. Strive for that which will benefit you, seek the help of Allah, and do not feel helpless.’ 

This teaching encourages us to view our strengths and abilities as a means to strive for what is beneficial, not as a tool for undermining or disrespecting others. 

By grounding your guidance in the principles of gratitude and responsibility, you can show your children that their tech talent is a gift that is meant to benefit their family and their community, not a weapon for challenging rules. Over time, this helps them to learn that the most honourable way to use any skill is with humility and in obedience to Allah Almighty.