What should parents do if their child criticises their own phone use as ‘old-fashioned’ or ‘uncool’? 

Parenting Perspective 

It is common for children to tease their parents for using technology more slowly, avoiding the latest apps, or preferring simpler tools. While these comments often stem from immaturity rather than malice, they can still sting and potentially undermine the atmosphere of respect in the home. Parents can use this criticism as a valuable teaching moment by modelling confidence, humility, and a mature perspective on technology. 

Stay Calm and Confident 

Instead of reacting defensively, try to respond with a light and confident tone: ‘My way of using my phone might seem simple to you, but that does not make it any less valuable for what I need it to do.’ This shows that you are secure in your choices and that your self-worth is not affected by their opinion on this matter. 

Teach Respectful Communication 

At a later, calmer moment, you can address the disrespect directly. Gently explain: ‘It is fine for you to notice that we do things differently, but using a mocking or belittling tone is not respectful. In our family, respect matters more than being considered ‘cool’.’ This sets clear boundaries without turning the initial moment into a harsh confrontation. 

Reframe Simplicity as a Strength 

Help your child to understand that choosing not to follow every new digital trend can be a sign of discipline and maturity. You could say: ‘I use my phone to help me with what is important in my life, not to follow the latest trend, and that is a choice I am proud of.’ This teaches them that technology is a tool, not a measure of worth. 

Encourage Them to See the Value of Balance 

Use this as an opportunity to explain that while it is fine for them to explore new tools, technology should ultimately serve our lives, not control them. By modelling an intentional use of your own devices, you teach your children what a healthy and balanced relationship with technology looks like. 

By responding with calm confidence and a clear sense of your own values, you can turn your child’s criticism into an important opportunity to teach them about respect and balance. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that a person’s true honour is not connected to superficial appearances or fleeting trends, but to their righteousness and wisdom. What may seem ‘uncool’ or ‘old-fashioned’ in the eyes of the world can, in fact, be a reflection of true dignity and strength. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verses 13: 

‘…Indeed, the best of you in the judgement of Allah (Almighty) is the one who is most virtuous; indeed, Allah (Almighty) is the Omniscient, the all Cognisant.‘ 

This powerful verse reminds us that our true worth is measured not by how well we fit into worldly standards of what is fashionable or modern, but by our level of righteousness in the sight of Allah. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1051, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Richness does not lie in the abundance of (worldly) goods, but richness is the richness of the soul.’ 

This teaching clarifies that real dignity and value come from a person’s inner strength and contentment, not from their possession of the latest gadgets or their participation in external trends. 

By grounding their response in faith, parents can show their children that confidence in simplicity is not a weakness, but a sign of a rich and contented soul. Over time, children can learn that technology should be a tool that reflects a sense of purpose, not vanity, and that what sometimes seems ‘old-fashioned’ can actually be a mark of timeless wisdom.