How can I encourage siblings to apologise sincerely? 

Parenting Perspective 

Link Actions to Feelings 

Many children say ‘sorry’ quickly just to end an argument, but they do not always mean it. A true apology comes from understanding that their words or actions hurt someone else’s feelings. To help your children apologise sincerely, start by slowing down the moment. Instead of forcing a rushed ‘sorry’, sit with them and gently ask, ‘Do you understand what hurt your sister?’ Help them to put it into words, such as, ‘I took your toy, and that made you feel sad.’ This simple step helps them to see the link between their actions and their sibling’s feelings. 

Practise and Praise 

You can role-play with toys or stories to show how a real apology sounds. Practise phrases such as, ‘I am sorry for taking your game. I will not do it again.’ Praise these small efforts, even if they do not get it right every time. Remind your children that an apology is not just about the words but about trying to fix what was wrong. Small actions like sharing a toy again or giving a comforting hug can help to rebuild trust. Try not to shame them if they struggle. Instead, repeat the message that mistakes happen, but we must try to make things better. Over time, these habits help your children grow hearts that feel genuine regret and care for each other. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam beautifully teaches us that owning up to our mistakes and seeking forgiveness are marks of true strength and humility. Allah Almighty encourages us to mend what has been harmed. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), Verse 134: 

‘Those (the believers are the ones) that spend (in the way of Allah Almighty) in times of abundance and hardship; they suppress their anger; and are forgiving to people; and Allah (Almighty) loves those who are benevolent. ‘

When you guide your children to apologise with truth and care, you help them practise these values from a young age. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1922, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘Whoever does not show mercy will not be shown mercy. ‘

Teaching your children to say sorry sincerely is part of nurturing this mercy within their hearts. Remind them that they can also make a small Dua after a mistake, such as, ‘Ya Allah, help me fix what I did wrong.’ These gentle reminders show your children that making mistakes is part of being human, but sincere apologies and efforts to mend things are part of what makes us beloved to Allah Almighty. Bit by bit, your family will grow a culture of honesty, forgiveness, and gentle hearts towards one another.