How do I teach my child about sharing and turn-taking? 

Parenting Perspective 

A Skill Learned Through Gentle Guidance 

Sharing and taking turns do not come naturally to most children; they are skills learned through gentle guidance, not instant rules. Young children often see toys as extensions of themselves, so the idea of giving them up can feel scary or unfair. Start by setting realistic expectations. Instead of demanding immediate sharing, teach them what it looks like through everyday play. 

Using Clear Language and Tools 

Use short, clear phrases: ‘It is your sister’s turn now; you will get it back soon.’ Offer a visual timer or count out loud to make waiting feel manageable. Model sharing yourself: ‘I am using this spoon, now it is your turn.’ Praise every effort, no matter how small: ‘That was kind of you to let him play with your car for a bit.’ 

Practising Through Play 

If your child struggles, do not shame them; instead, stay calm and patient. Practise through games that naturally involve turn-taking, like board games or ball play. Keep playdates short to prevent overwhelm and step in early if tensions build. For children with SEN needs, break it down even more simply, using toys they feel less possessive about at first. 

Balancing Sharing with Security 

Explain that sometimes it is okay to have special items they do not have to share, but most toys are for everyone. This balance helps them feel secure while still learning generosity. Over time, these little moments build the habit of taking turns, without forcing them to give up what they treasure most before they are ready. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam encourages us to give generously and treat others with fairness, starting within the family. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Imran (3), Verse 92: 

‘Never will you attain the good [reward] until you spend [in the way of Allah] from that which you love… ‘

This Ayah reminds us that sharing what we love is a sign of a soft, generous heart. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught this by example; he ﷺ gave willingly and praised those who gave from what they held dear. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 13, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

None of you will have faith till he loves for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself.

Teach your child that when they share, they are not just being nice; they are practising an act loved by Allah Almighty. 

Make a simple Dua together: ‘O Allah Almighty, help me share what I have and be patient when waiting for my turn.’ Keep reminding them that taking turns and sharing are ways to grow a kind heart, one that pleases Allah Almighty and makes friendships blossom. 

By guiding them with patience, praise, and spiritual connection, you help your child build habits of generosity and fairness that will, InshaAllah, shape their character for life.