What stress is caused when friends brag about online shopping hauls? 

Parenting Perspective 

When a child’s friends constantly brag about their latest online shopping hauls, a child who cannot make similar purchases can be left feeling inadequate or excluded. This can create a sense of social pressure, where it feels like owning certain things is a requirement for belonging to the group. A child in this situation may begin to doubt their own worth, simply because they do not have the same items. 

Creating Feelings of Inferiority and Exclusion 

The culture of ‘hauls’ is built on display and comparison. For a child who is not part of this, it can feel like being on the outside of an exclusive club. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and a belief that they are somehow less important than their peers. 

The Pressure to Compete 

Hearing friends boast about their latest purchases fosters an unhealthy pressure to compete. Children may begin to demand unnecessary items from their parents or feel upset when their requests cannot be met. This competitive cycle disrupts their contentment and can lead to arguments and tension within the home. 

The Erosion of Gratitude 

When a child is surrounded by constant talk of new acquisitions, they can stop appreciating what they already have. Simple blessings like family meals, books, or existing toys can lose their value when compared to a friend’s new and flashy possessions. This gradually erodes their sense of gratitude. 

The Long-Term Effects on Behaviour 

This mindset can shape a child’s behaviour for years to come. 

• A Material Obsession: They may begin to link their happiness directly with the act of buying things. 

• Social Insecurity: They might fear losing friendships if they cannot keep up with the spending habits of their peers. 

• Financial Recklessness: Later in life, they may feel a need to overspend just to maintain appearances. 

Helping Children to Resist the Stress 

Parents can support their children with gentle and consistent guidance. 

• Talk openly about how bragging often hides insecurity or is an exaggeration of reality. 

• Remind them that friendships built on possessions are weak, while true friends value a person’s character. 

• Encourage your child to celebrate their own unique strengths and blessings. 

• Model gratitude at home and create joy in simple, shared experiences that do not rely on shopping. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam warns against the spiritual dangers of both boasting about one’s possessions and feeling envy for what others have. The culture of ‘shopping hauls’ can fuel both of these negative traits, distracting a child from the more important goals of gratitude, humility, and sincerity. 

A Quranic Reminder on Competition in Worldly Goods 

The Quran warns that a life spent chasing material gain is a distraction that pulls us away from our true purpose. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Takaathur (102), Verses 1-2: 

‘Are you diverted by the obsession of infinite (worldly wealth)? Until such time as you observe the place of your demise (on this Earth).‘ 

This verse teaches that a rivalry over possessions has no lasting value. 

The Prophetic Teaching on True Wealth 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that true richness is an inner state of contentment, not an external display of possessions. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6446, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Wealth is not in having many possessions, but wealth is being content with the soul.’ 

This hadith shows that boasting over what one has bought does not bring happiness, but contentment enriches the heart. 

By grounding children in gratitude and teaching them that Allah values sincerity over possessions, parents can protect them from the stress caused by their peers’ boasting. This helps a child to develop confidence in their own worth, find joy in simplicity, and nurture a resilience against the pressures of modern consumer culture.