What small rewards do not overshadow the value of service? 

Parenting Perspective 

When attempting to encourage service or helpfulness, parents must be careful that the rewards they offer do not overshadow the act of giving itself. Large or frequent material incentives (such as money or toys) can unintentionally transform voluntary good deeds into transactional behaviour, leading children to expect recognition for everything they do. 

The key is to utilise subtle, meaningful incentives that reinforce intrinsic motivation. These rewards should feel like a gentle acknowledgement of their effort, rather than the primary reason for the action. 

• Time and Connection: Instead of material goods, use acknowledgements that centre on shared time and connection, such as: 

• Extra playtime or a later bedtime for one night. 

• Reading a favourite story or an extra book at bedtime. 

• A brief, shared activity (like baking or a simple game) chosen by the child. 

Link Rewards to Reflection and Connection 

To ensure the focus remains on the act of service, pair the small reward with a discussion or moment of reflection. The reward should serve as a bookend to a valuable experience, not the end-goal. 

• Reflective Questions: After they help, engage them by asking: ‘How did it feel to help your friend or family today?’ or ‘I saw how patiently you helped—what part of that act made you feel proud?’ 

• Strengthening the Connection: This dialogue strengthens the link between the child’s effort, the positive impact they created, and their personal growth. The reward becomes a gentle confirmation of their virtuous choice. 

Emphasise Praise over Material Incentives 

The most valuable non-material reward is thoughtful verbal recognition. Use specific praise that highlights the character traits demonstrated during the service. 

• Specific, Descriptive Praise: Focus on the how and the why of the action: 

• ‘I noticed how carefully and thoughtfully you arranged the books for your sibling.’ 

• ‘Your generous help made today much easier for everyone.’ 

• ‘That showed great patience when your friend was struggling with their task.’ 

Over time, children internalise that contribution and thoughtfulness are intrinsically rewarding, fostering a lasting sense of satisfaction that is not dependent on external validation. 

Spiritual Insight 

Service Done for Allah Almighty Alone 

In Islam, the true value of a deed lies not in how it is acknowledged by people but in the purity of intention behind it. Teaching children that act of service should be done for Allah Almighty’s pleasure rather than for material gain instils sincerity (ikhlas) from a young age. Parents can gently remind them that every kind gesture, no matter how small, is seen by Allah Almighty and carries a reward far beyond what anyone can give in return. When a child learns that goodness itself brings spiritual joy, they begin to associate helping others with inner peace and divine closeness rather than applause or gifts. 

The Divine Multiplier of Sincere Deeds 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 261: 
‘The example of those who spend their wealth in the way of Allah (Almighty) is like the parable of a seed (of grain) which grows seven stems; on each stem is one hundred grains; and Allah (Almighty) multiplies (His reward to mankind seven hundred times per good deed or) even more for whom He (Allah Almighty) wills…’ 

This powerful imagery captures the generosity of Allah Almighty’s reward system — a single sincere act can multiply infinitely in spiritual value. For children, this verse offers a simple yet profound lesson: even the smallest act of service, when done with pure intention, holds enormous weight with Allah Almighty. Parents can use this example to show that a smile, a helping hand, or an act of quiet care is like planting a seed of goodness that will blossom in ways only Allah knows. This perspective helps them find fulfilment in doing good, not in being seen doing good. 

The Blessing of Easing Another’s Burden 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1930, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 
‘Whoever relieves a believer’s distress of the distressful aspects of this world, Allah will rescue him from a difficulty of the difficulties of the Hereafter.’ 

This hadith expands the idea of reward beyond material acknowledgment. It reminds believers that every act of service — from comforting a friend to sharing a small kindness — carries eternal significance. Parents can teach children that Allah Almighty values compassion and selflessness, and that by easing another’s burden, they are ensuring mercy for themselves in the Hereafter. This understanding reframes service from something to be rewarded in the moment to something that builds spiritual wealth that lasts forever. 

Nurturing a Spirit of Humble Generosity 

When parents use small, thoughtful acknowledgements instead of grand rewards, they help children connect service to sincerity, not status. The joy of being kind becomes its own motivator, and gratitude replaces expectation. Over time, children internalise that Allah Almighty’s recognition is the highest honour, and that real reward lies in the unseen blessings that flow from pure intentions. Through this lens, every quiet act of goodness — no matter how unnoticed — becomes an offering of love to the Creator, growing their faith, character, and sense of purpose.