What should I say if my child feels unfairly treated by teachers? 

Parenting Perspective 

Listen and Validate Their Feelings 

Sometimes children feel they have been treated unfairly by a teacher. They might say they were blamed for something they did not do, were spoken to harshly, or feel they are being singled out. These feelings can sit heavily on a child’s heart and make them dread going to school. Start by listening fully to what happened without immediately jumping to defend the teacher or dismiss your child’s feelings. Use calm words: ‘Tell me exactly what happened and how it made you feel.’ This helps your child to trust that their feelings matter to you. 

Practice and Prepare 

After listening, help them to see if there might be another perspective. You can ask, ‘Do you think the teacher might have misunderstood something?’ Talk through what they could do next. Practise gentle phrases they might use, such as, ‘I felt upset when you said that. Could we talk about it?’ If they feel too shy to speak, suggest they write a note or speak privately with the teacher when they feel calm. If the problem continues, you can speak to the teacher yourself in a respectful way. Remind your child that it is always okay to stand up for themselves, but in a kind and honest manner. Over time, this gentle guidance teaches them that their voice deserves to be heard and that fairness matters, while also showing them how to handle conflict without anger or blame. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches us to stand for fairness and speak the truth kindly. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nisa (4), Verse 135: 

‘O you who are believers, remain upright in upholding justice, bearing witness (to such actions) for the sake of Allah (Almighty); even if it goes against your own interest, or that of your parents, or your close relatives….‘

Sharing this Ayah reminds your child that seeking fairness is not disrespectful; it is a noble part of our faith when done with respect. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2594a, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Gentleness is not in anything except that it beautifies it, and it is not removed from anything except that it makes it defective.‘

Teach your child that raising a concern is best done with gentle words and a calm heart. Encourage them to make a small Dua before speaking up: ‘Ya Allah, help me speak the truth with respect.’ By linking these moments to their faith, your child will learn that fairness, honesty, and gentleness can live together, and that Allah Almighty knows what is in their heart, even if others misunderstand.