What should a child say if a mark seems wrong and they want a recheck? 

Parenting Perspective 

When your child believes that a mark or grade they have received is unfair, it can stir up strong emotions such as frustration, disappointment, and even self-doubt. Their first impulse might be to protest with phrases like, “That is not fair!” or “You marked it wrong!” However, reacting defensively can strain the teacher-student relationship and reduce the chance of a fair review. Teaching your child how to request a recheck with calmness and respect helps them to stand up for themselves in a thoughtful way. This is a skill that blends confidence with courtesy and will serve them throughout their life. 

Helping Them Recognise the True Goal 

Explain to your child that the aim of their request is not to “prove the teacher wrong,” but to seek understanding and fairness. You could say, ‘You are not arguing with your teacher; you are just asking for some clarity. The goal is to learn and to make sure your work was seen correctly.’ This important shift in mindset can turn a potential confrontation into a moment of collaboration. 

Acknowledging Their Feeling First 

Before you start guiding their words, it is important to validate their initial emotion. For example, ‘It is normal to feel upset when you think a mistake has been made. What matters is how we ask for it to be reviewed: calmly and respectfully.’ This validation helps your child to move from a reactive state to a more reflective one. 

Teaching a Polite and Professional Tone 

Show your child how to combine respect, gratitude, and clarity in their request. A gentle tone conveys maturity and makes the teacher more receptive. 

• ‘Excuse me, I was reviewing my test and wondered if you could double-check this part. I think I might have misunderstood something.’ 

• ‘Thank you for checking my work. I just wanted to ask about this answer; could you explain how it was marked?’ 

• A particularly good phrase is: ‘Could you please take another look at this part? I think there might be a small mistake.’ 

Each of these phrases shows confidence without accusation, and respect without submission. 

Practising Calm and Respectful Body Language 

Remind your child that their manners are also conveyed through their posture and facial expression. You can teach them to: 

• Approach the teacher when they are not busy or surrounded by other students. 

• Speak at a normal volume and a steady pace. 

• Maintain gentle and steady eye contact. 

These subtle non-verbal cues show emotional control and make it easier for the teacher to listen openly. 

Using Role-Play to Practise the Scenario 

Role-playing can help your child to prepare for real-life moments at school. Rehearsing the conversation in a safe environment teaches your child that politeness and assertiveness can coexist beautifully. 

Modelling Respect for the Final Outcome 

Even if the teacher reviews the paper and does not change the grade, it is important to guide your child to respond with grace. They could say, ‘Thank you for rechecking it for me. I understand it better now.’ This response shows emotional maturity and helps to build trust. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, the virtues of fairness (‘adl) and respect (adab) are both central to a believer’s character. The pursuit of justice must always be guided by humility and good manners. When your child asks for a recheck politely, they are putting their adab into action by combining a thoughtful assertiveness with respect, and a desire for truth with gentleness. 

The Quranic Balance Between Justice and Respect 

The Quran beautifully balances the command for justice with the encouragement of kindness and good conduct. We are taught to stand for what is right, but to do so in a way that does not cross the boundaries of respect. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Nahal (16), Verses 90: 

‘Indeed, Allah (Almighty) orders you to promote justice and benevolence; and to be generous towards (positively developing) those that are within your jurisdiction; and to prevent that which is immoral, acts of irrationality, and cruelty; and He (Allah Almighty) offers this enlightened direction so that you continue to realise (the true pathway of Islam).’ 

When your child seeks fairness in their marking but does so with good conduct, they are embodying the spirit of this verse. 

The Prophetic Example of Gentle Correction 

The teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ remind us that how we speak matters just as much as what we say. Gentleness should be a feature of all our interactions. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4809, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Whoever is deprived of gentleness is deprived of all good.‘ 

When your child seeks a correction in a gentle, not a harsh, way, they preserve the dignity of both themselves and their teacher. Their calm tone can turn a moment of potential tension into an opportunity for mutual respect and learning. 

When your child learns to say, “Could you please check this again?”, they are discovering that fairness and respect can live in the same sentence. They are learning that standing up for themselves does not mean they have to speak over someone; it means they have to speak with grace. 

Each polite request strengthens their confidence while preserving a sense of harmony. Over time, they will discover that kindness earns more influence and achieves better results than confrontation ever could. 

In every such moment, when the truth is sought through patience and gentleness, your child comes to reflect the noble balance to which Islam calls us: to seek what is right, but always in a way that keeps hearts united and manners intact, for the sake of Allah Almighty.