What role should a father play in teaching Deen beyond just correcting mistakes?

Parenting Perspective

A father’s role in teaching the faith is most powerful when it comes from a place of connection, not just correction. While pointing out mistakes is sometimes necessary, a child’s love for the Deen is nurtured through a father’s warmth, presence, and positive example.

Explain the ‘Why’ Behind Worship

Guidance becomes more meaningful when it is linked to personal experience. Instead of simply criticising a child for missing a prayer, a father can share his own perspective: ‘I find that Salah helps me feel calm and grounded, especially when I am stressed. I want you to have that same peace’. This approach connects the act of worship to a real-world benefit.

Model the Deen Through Shared Activities

Faith is taught most effectively through action, not just words. A father can model the Deen by initiating shared spiritual activities, such as reading a short passage of the Quran together, telling a story of the Prophets before bed, or involving the child in a small act of charity. When a child sees their father living the values of the faith, the lesson is absorbed deeply and naturally.

Foster Dialogue, Not Just Instruction

A father’s role is not only to teach but also to listen and learn alongside his child. Asking questions like, ‘What did that verse make you think about?’ transforms a one-sided lecture into an interactive dialogue. When a father shows humility in learning, it demonstrates a crucial aspect of true spiritual leadership.

When a father’s guidance is anchored in love and shared experience, his children will see the faith as a source of warmth and strength, not just a list of rules.

Spiritual Insight

Islamic leadership, especially within the family, is founded on character, mercy, and mutual consultation, not just authority.

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Ash Shura (42), Verse 38:

‘And those who have responded to their Lord and established prayer and whose affair is [determined by] consultation among themselves…’

This verse highlights shura, or consultation, as a key characteristic of a healthy believing community. For a father, this means that his spiritual leadership at home should be based on open dialogue and shared understanding, not dominance. This approach nurtures a child’s love for the Deen, rather than enforcing compliance through fear.

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that our faith is perfected through our character at home.

It is recorded in Jami at-Tirmidhi, 1162, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:

‘Indeed among the believers with the most complete faith is the one who is the best in conduct, and the most kind to his family.’

This beautiful hadith establishes a direct link between the strength of one’s faith and their kindness to their family. A father who teaches the Deen with a gentle heart, patience, and a loving example is not only instructing his child but is also embodying the prophetic model of perfect faith.