What is the best way to talk about cheating in online games without causing shame? 

Parenting Perspective 

Approach with Curiosity, Not Accusation 

For a child who feels pressured to win, cheating in an online game can be very tempting. The key is to correct this behaviour without damaging their self-esteem. It is best to choose a calm moment to talk, and to approach with curiosity, not accusation: ‘I noticed you found a shortcut in that game. Can you tell me a bit about it?’ This opens up a conversation and helps you to understand their motivation. 

Explain the Importance of Fair Play 

You can then explain that the fun of a game is built on trust and fairness. Saying, ‘A win that comes from cheating does not feel as satisfying as one that comes from your own real effort,’ helps to frame honesty as a more rewarding path. Asking how they would feel if someone cheated against them can also help them to see the issue from another perspective. 

Encourage Progress and Resilience 

It is important to remind them that mistakes are an opportunity to learn. If they are honest about what they did, that honesty should be praised. Encourage them to focus on improving their skills rather than looking for shortcuts. By modelling fair play yourself and setting it as a clear family value, you reinforce the message that integrity matters in all things. 

Spiritual Insight 

Cheating is a Betrayal of Trust 

Islam places great importance on honesty and upholding trusts. The Quran reminds believers that any form of dishonesty is a betrayal, whether in major dealings or in minor ones like family games. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Anfaal (8), Verse 27: 

‘ O you who are believers, do not ever be pretentious (in following the commandment) of Allah (Almighty) and His Prophet (Muhammad ﷺ)…’ 

Fairness in All Dealings 

The prophetic tradition commands believers to be just and fair in all their dealings, and to avoid causing any loss or harm to others through deception. This principle of justice applies to all of our actions. 

It is recorded in Muwatta Malik, 100, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Give full measure and full weight with justice, and do not cause loss to the people in their things, and do not commit abuse on the earth, spreading corruption.’ 

An Uplifting Correction 

When you connect the idea of fair play to the Islamic value of trustworthiness, your child learns that avoiding cheating is not just about game rules, but about building an honest character that is pleasing to Allah. In this way, the correction becomes an uplifting lesson, guiding them towards integrity without shame.