What is the best way to discuss digital risks like grooming or exploitation without scaring or shutting teens down? 

Parenting Perspective 

Discussing sensitive topics like online grooming and exploitation requires a delicate touch. Parents naturally worry about frightening their teenagers, but at the same time, they need to ensure their children understand the seriousness of these risks. The most effective approach is to speak openly, calmly, and respectfully, with the goal of equipping your teenager with awareness and practical tools, rather than overwhelming them with fear. 

Keep the Tone Calm and Respectful 

Avoid using dramatic or frightening language that can cause a teenager to shut down. Instead of saying, ‘The internet is full of dangerous people,’ you could try a calmer approach: ‘Sometimes people online pretend to be someone they are not, and I want to make sure you know how to protect yourself.’ 

Focus on Awareness, Not Fear 

Explain the risks in clear, practical terms. Describe the common tactics predators use, such as trying to gain a young person’s trust over time, asking for secrets, or offering gifts and compliments. Encourage your teenager to think critically about any unusual or uncomfortable online behaviour, rather than making them feel that everyone they encounter online is a threat. 

Emphasise Safety Over Punishment 

It is vital to reassure them that their safety is your number one priority. You could say: ‘If anything ever happens online that makes you feel uncomfortable, you will not be in trouble for telling me. We will figure it out together.’ This reassurance is key to preventing them from staying silent out of fear. 

Invite Their Perspective 

Make the conversation interactive and respectful by asking for their thoughts. You could ask questions like: ‘What would you do if a stranger you did not know messaged you?’ or ‘What are some of the signs that tell you someone online might not be trustworthy?’ This empowers them to think for themselves and shows that you value their intelligence. 

By focusing on teaching awareness instead of instilling fear, parents can help prepare their teenagers to be cautious and confident online, rather than anxious and secretive. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that protecting one’s dignity and honour is a fundamental part of faith. Young people should be guided to understand that their safety and self-respect are precious trusts (amanah) given to them by Allah Almighty. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Isra (17), Verses 32: 

‘And do not approach unlawful sexual relations. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way…’ 

This verse reminds us that the boundaries established around dignity and purity are not arbitrary restrictions, but divine safeguards for our spiritual and emotional well-being. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, 2165, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘There is no man who is alone with a woman but the Shaytan is the third one present.’ 

This teaching highlights that boundaries exist for our protection. It encourages a sense of vigilance when dealing with strangers, a principle that is even more critical in the hidden and anonymous spaces of the online world. 

By grounding the conversation about digital safety in the Islamic values of dignity, honour, and protection, parents can help their teenagers see that being cautious is an expression of self-worth, not a sign of parental mistrust. This approach helps them to understand, over time, that protecting themselves online is an act of self-respect and a way of honouring their relationship with Allah Almighty.