What is a good way to set expectations around honesty before games begin? 

Parenting Perspective 

Setting clear expectations before a game begins is one of the most effective ways to encourage fair play. By establishing the rules and emphasising the importance of honesty from the outset, you can prevent many common conflicts. This simple step transforms playtime from a potential source of friction into a relaxed and enjoyable opportunity to practise integrity. 

Establish the Rules Together 

Before the first move is made, gather everyone to briefly go over the rules. Asking the children to explain the rules in their own words ensures everyone is on the same page. This creates a sense of shared ownership and makes it easier to resolve disputes later. 

Connect Honesty with Enjoyment 

Explicitly link fairness to the fun of the game. You could say, ‘The whole point of this is to have a good time together, and we can only do that if we are all honest and fair.’ This helps children see integrity not as a boring restriction, but as the foundation of shared fun. 

Frame Play as Practice for Life 

Help them see the bigger picture by explaining how games are a form of practice. Say, ‘Being fair in a game helps us learn to be fair in more important things, like at school or with our friends.’ This gives their actions a greater sense of purpose and meaning. 

Create Space for Self-Correction 

Let your children know that mistakes are okay, as long as they are corrected honestly. You can reassure them by saying, ‘If you accidentally break a rule, just say so and we will fix it. Being honest about a mistake is a sign of strength.’ This removes the fear of admitting an error. 

By setting a clear and positive tone from the start, you not only prevent conflict but also transform family games into a meaningful and enjoyable way to practise honesty. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that honesty and fairness should be woven into the fabric of our daily lives, no matter how trivial the activity may seem. When you set expectations for truthfulness before a game, you are teaching your children to live by the noble values that Allah Almighty loves. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Maaidah (5), Verse 8: 

‘You who are believers, become steadfast (in your devotion) to Allah (Almighty), corroborating all of that which is just; and never let your hatred of any nation prevent you from being just, – let justice prevail, as that is very close to attaining piety…’ 

This verse commands us to be unwavering in our commitment to justice, making it clear that fairness is a cornerstone of piety and a reflection of our duty to Allah. 

It is recorded in Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith 4790, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The believer is simple and generous, but the wicked person is deceitful and ignoble.’ 

This hadith beautifully contrasts the character of a believer with that of a wicked person. Generosity and simplicity, which include being straightforward and fair, are signs of faith, while deceit reflects a poor character. 

By framing games as opportunities to practise fairness, you prepare your children to carry honesty into every part of their lives. Over time, they will see that being truthful is not just for play but for earning trust, dignity, and closeness to Allah Almighty.