Parenting Perspective 

Correcting a child in public can be a difficult experience for both of you. Afterwards, it is important to offer a compassionate apology to help your child feel supported, valued, and loved. A thoughtful apology acknowledges the mistake in your approach, reassures your child that their feelings matter, and models how to repair relationships respectfully. This helps to restore their confidence and sense of security, while also teaching them by example how to take responsibility. 

Acknowledge the Public Setting 

Begin by acknowledging the setting where the correction took place, showing empathy for how your child might have felt in front of others. This validates their emotional response and demonstrates that you are aware of their discomfort. 

You could say: ‘I realise I corrected you in front of others, and that was not fair to you. I am truly sorry for making you feel embarrassed.’ 

This statement shows that you understand how the public nature of the correction impacted their feelings, helping them feel seen and understood. 

Take Full Responsibility for the Method 

Taking responsibility for the way you corrected your child teaches them the value of accountability without diminishing their sense of self-worth. It clarifies that your method was the issue. 

You might say: ‘It was my mistake to correct you publicly. I should have spoken to you in private, and I apologise for making you feel uncomfortable.’ 

This clearly acknowledges the error in your approach and shows that the action, not the child, was the problem. 

Reaffirm Your Intention to Guide 

End the apology by reassuring your child of your love and commitment to their well-being. Emphasising that your intention was to guide them rather than shame them helps to foster a sense of security in your relationship. 

You can say: ‘I care about you deeply, and I want to help you learn in a way that supports you, not makes you feel bad. I will be more mindful next time.’ 

This reassurance shows that your intent is to guide, not to criticise, and that you are committed to doing better. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, showing kindness, empathy, and humility is essential when interacting with others, especially when we make mistakes. A compassionate apology models these virtues and helps foster healthy relationships built on respect and understanding. 

The Importance of Respect and Discretion 

The noble Quran speaks to the importance of discretion and respect in our interactions. When we correct our children, doing so with kindness and consideration for their dignity aligns with these core Islamic values. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ahzaab (33), Verse 59: 

‘ O Prophet (Muhammad ﷺ upon whom have been conveyed the secret codes of existential realities) , say to your wives, and your daughters and the women who are believers; to cover themselves (fully) with their (outer) garments; this is more appropriate, in order that they are recognised (as chaste women) and not harmed; and (as always) Allah (Almighty) is Most Forgiving and Most Merciful.‘ 

While this verse discusses modesty, its underlying principle is one of protecting a person’s dignity, which is a key part of compassionate correction. 

The Prophetic Example of Kindness to Family 

The teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ emphasise the importance of showing compassion and gentleness in all our relationships, especially with our loved ones. 

It is recorded in Mishkaat Al Masaabih, Hadith 3252, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families, and I am the best of you to my family.’ 

A compassionate apology, particularly after a public correction, reflects the Prophet’s ﷺ beautiful example of kindness and humility.