What if screen time bonding turns into screen time arguments? How do I intervene fairly? 

Parenting Perspective 

Even when a screen is intended to bring siblings together, disagreements over what to watch, who holds the device, or whose turn it is can quickly turn a bonding moment into bickering. The key is to intervene in a way that teaches conflict resolution and reinforces fairness, rather than simply enforcing silence. 

Pause the Screen to Prioritise Respect 

The moment an argument begins, calmly pause or turn off the device. This action immediately sends a clear and powerful message: respectful communication is more important than entertainment. It creates a neutral space in which to address the actual problem without the distraction of the screen itself. 

Hear Both Sides with Impartiality 

Give each child a brief, uninterrupted turn to explain their side of the story. Your role here is not to be a judge who declares a winner, but a calm facilitator who ensures that each child feels seen and heard. This simple act of listening validates their feelings and models the importance of seeking to understand before seeking to be understood. 

Offer a Clear, Consequence-Based Choice 

Once you understand the issue, state the options calmly and clearly, shifting the responsibility for the solution back to them. You might say, “You can either find a way to agree on what to watch together, or we can put the tablet away for now and find something else to do.” This empowers them to find a compromise while making the natural consequence of failing to do so very clear. 

Proactively Rotate Privileges 

If arguments over control are a recurring issue, the best solution is a proactive one. Create a simple, visible schedule for who gets to choose the content or hold the device on different days. Having these privileges clearly rotated and agreed upon in advance can prevent countless in-the-moment tensions before they even begin. 

By staying calm and treating these disagreements as teachable moments, you can model effective problem-solving while protecting the fairness and peace of your home. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places a profound value on justice and fairness (‘adl), especially within the family, and teaches that resolving disputes with wisdom and mercy is an act that strengthens relationships. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hujuraat (49), Verse 10: 

‘Indeed, the believers are brothers (to each other); so, make peace with your brothers; and seek piety from Allah (Almighty) so that you may receive His Mercy…’ 

This verse reminds us that fostering unity and guiding our children towards reconciliation is an act that is beloved by Allah and one that brings His mercy into the home. 

It is recorded by al-Tabarani that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved of people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to the people.’ 

This beautiful hadith teaches us that our value is elevated when we bring benefit to others. Guiding children to be considerate, to share, and to find compromises is a practical way of teaching them how to be beneficial to one another. When you intervene with fairness and guide your children to reconcile, you are not just ending an argument; you are actively building the Islamic values of respect, mercy, and cooperation that will serve them for a lifetime.