Parenting Perspective 

It can certainly feel embarrassing when a child rushes to eat before guests have been served. This behaviour often comes from simple excitement or hunger, not deliberate disrespect. Rather than shaming them, the focus should be on gently guiding them towards understanding why waiting is an important part of hospitality and good manners. 

Explain the Value of Waiting 

Teach your child in simple, clear terms why guests are given priority. You could say, ‘In our home, we honour our guests by letting them eat first. When we wait, we are showing them respect and making them feel very welcome.’ Linking this rule to the values of kindness and care helps them see it as a meaningful gesture, not just another restriction. 

Practise the Etiquette Beforehand 

If you are expecting guests, you can prepare your child in advance with a gentle reminder: ‘Today, we will make sure our guests have their food first, and then it will be our turn to eat.’ You can also role-play this at home during family meals, pretending to serve an elder or a ‘guest’ first so they can practise the act of waiting in a safe and familiar setting. 

Correct Gently in the Moment 

If your child forgets and starts to eat early, avoid scolding them in front of others. A quiet, gentle reminder like, ‘Let’s just wait until everyone has been served, please,’ is far more effective. You can discuss the importance of the rule calmly with them later, and praise them for their efforts to be more patient next time. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places great emphasis on the act of honouring guests and showing them priority. A key aspect of this is the etiquette of offering them food before serving ourselves. 

The Virtue of Preferring Others 

The Quran praises the highest form of generosity, which is to give preference to others even when one is in need. This principle of selflessness is a hallmark of a true believer. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Hashar (59), Verses 9: 

‘…And giving preference over themselves, even though they were impecunious themselves; and whoever is salvaged from (the inherent state of) being miserly for himself, then they are the victorious.’ 

The Etiquette of Serving First 

The prophetic tradition teaches that there is a respected order when serving others, with priority often given based on age and status as a guest. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1779, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Let the older begin, let the older begin.’ 

By teaching your child that guests should be served first, you are helping them to connect everyday table manners with the profound Islamic values of generosity and humility. They will learn that waiting is not a loss, but a beautiful way of earning the pleasure of Allah and bringing blessings into the home.