What helps when a tablet makes my child deaf to the room? 

Parenting Perspective 

You call your child’s name, but there is no response. Their eyes are glued to the screen, their fingers moving rapidly, and the world around them seems to have vanished. It can feel as though the tablet has stolen their attention, and in some ways, it has. The device offers constant stimulation and an immediate sense of reward. Before your frustration turns to shouting, however, it is helpful to remember that your goal is not to fight against the screen, but to restore your connection. 

Understanding Digital Immersion 

When a child seems ‘deaf to the room’, it is not always an act of defiance. The tablet can capture their full sensory focus, causing everything else, including your voice, to fade into the background. This state is known as digital immersion. Understanding this can help you to avoid misinterpreting their silence as disrespect. What they need is not a harsher correction, but a gentle bridge back to a state of presence. 

Establish a ‘Pause and Look’ Rule 

Before your child begins to use their tablet, it is important to set a clear agreement. You could say, ‘If I call your name, you need to pause your game and look at me straight away. Then you can go back to it once we are done.’ You can practise this together, starting by calling them softly from nearby and giving them a moment to comply. Be sure to praise their response: ‘Thank you for pausing so quickly. That is what respect looks like.’ Repetition, not reprimand, is what builds the habit. 

Use Proximity Over Volume 

Calling from another room rarely works. Instead, it is more effective to move closer, touch their shoulder gently, and wait for eye contact before you speak. This physical touch helps to reset their awareness more quickly than a raised voice ever could. Once you have their attention, you can speak in a normal tone. This quiet, deliberate method communicates your authority through your presence, not through a show of power. 

Create Predictable Tech-Free Zones 

It can be helpful to reserve certain family times, such as meals, prayers, or car rides, as ‘no-device zones’.¹ This rule should be consistent for everyone in the family, including the adults. These moments re-anchor your child in real-world communication, teaching them that connecting with people deserves our full attention. When the rule is framed around family togetherness rather than as a restriction, children are often more willing to honour it. 

Balance Connection with Compassion 

If you need your child to stop using their tablet immediately, an empathetic approach will work far better than a direct command. You could say, ‘I can see you are enjoying your video, but I need your help now. Let us pause it and come back to it later.’ This acknowledges their enjoyment while still asserting your need. Over time, this tone helps to build trust and responsiveness, not resentment. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam places a deep emphasis on presence, on being fully aware of the people and the duties that are around us. Giving our attention is a form of respect, and distraction, when it is left unchecked, can dull both the heart and the mind. Teaching a child to pause and listen is not just about etiquette; it is a form of spiritual training in mindfulness and responsibility. 

The Quranic Emphasis on Attentiveness 

The Quran reminds us that listening attentively is linked to receiving rahmah (mercy).² Encouraging your child to pause and listen when they are called nurtures this same discipline of focused attention. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Aa’raaf (7), Verse 204: 

‘And when the Quran is recited, so listen to it, and pay attention to it, so that you may receive mercy (from Allah Almighty).’ 

This teaches them that listening is not an act of submission, but a form of respect that brings peace and harmony to the home. 

The Prophetic Example of Presence 

The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that honouring another person means giving them our full presence. When parents patiently guide their children to look up from their screens and to listen fully, they are cultivating the very adab, or respectful attention, that the Prophet ﷺ lived by. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 505, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘When one of you is speaking to another, let him not turn away before he has finished.’ 

When your child’s world seems lost inside a tablet, the solution is not louder calls, but an intentional reconnection. Calm proximity, clear expectations, and shared family rhythms can create an environment where a child’s attention naturally returns to the world around them. Each small act of pausing and looking up becomes more than just an act of obedience; it becomes a lesson in mindfulness, a reminder that listening is about valuing relationships. 

Over time, as your consistency steadies the rhythm of your home, screens will lose their power to disconnect. What will remain is the gentle sound of trust: a parent’s voice that is heard, a child’s heart that is responsive, and a home that is anchored once again in warmth, respect, and faith.