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What helps my child feel fully seen when they talk to me? 

Parenting Perspective

There is more to being seen than being heard. It implies that your eyes, body, and heart are with your child when they talk about a drawing, a dream, or a worry. This calls for turning off all other distractions, lowering oneself to their level, and reacting with both verbal and emotional presence. ‘It sounds like that made you really happy’ or ‘That must have felt scary’ are examples of reflective listening. Youngsters who experience being noticed are more resilient, safe, and articulate. They learn early on that they are important just by virtue of their existence, not because they accomplished something.  

Spiritual Insight

Being truly present is an act of spirituality. Regardless of the age of the person speaking to him, the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ gave his whole attention. He faced them with his whole body, not just his head. He honoured each soul in this way. It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 2392, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: ‘When one of you has love for his brother, he should inform him that he loves him.’ If love must be expressed, then how much more so should presence be shown to our children. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Luqman (31), Verse 19: ‘And be modest in your attitude and lower your voice (in dealing with people); as indeed, the harshest of all sounds is the noise of the donkeys.’ This verse serves as a reminder to treat everyone with composure, dignity, and attention, particularly to our children. A kid experiences a glimpse of how Allah Almighty sees and cherishes them completely, uninterrupted, and with boundless compassion when they feel noticed.  

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