Parenting Perspective 

Conflicts are an inevitable part of family life; children will argue with their siblings, test their parents’ limits, or react with anger when they feel frustrated. In these situations, what matters most is not the absence of conflict, but how quickly a sense of warmth is restored afterwards. If a feeling of tension is allowed to linger, a child may begin to feel insecure or unloved. However, if a parent is able to show warmth promptly, they can teach the powerful lesson that love is always stronger than our mistakes. This act of rebuilding a connection after a disagreement shows a child that relationships can bend without breaking, and that forgiveness is a living, breathing part of family life. 

Use Words of Repair Immediately 

After a moment of discipline or a quarrel has been resolved, it is important to offer words of repair. A simple sentence like, ‘I was upset with what you did, but I want you to know that I will always love you,’ can be very powerful. These words help to clarify for a child that while their behaviour may need to be corrected, the bond of love between you remains safe. 

Reintroduce Warmth Through Physical Affection 

A gentle hug, a hand on the shoulder, or simply sharing a warm smile can quickly repair the emotional bridge between you and your child. For many children, this kind of non-verbal reassurance speaks more loudly and clearly than any lecture could. 

End the Conflict with a Shared Dua 

You can invite your child to say a short, simple dua with you, such as, ‘Ya Allah, please forgive us and help us to be kind to each other again.’ The act of praying side by side after a conflict helps to reframe the moment as an act of worship, rather than as a source of ongoing tension. 

Create a Shared Family ‘Peace Gesture’ 

It can be a lovely idea to introduce a small, unique family ritual that signals reconciliation. This could be a special handshake, drawing a heart in the air, or gently touching foreheads. These familiar and often playful habits can make the act of repair feel natural and easy. 

Return to a State of Normalcy Quickly 

After an issue has been resolved and feelings have been repaired, it is a good practice to move back into your normal, everyday activities, whether that is reading a story, playing a game, or sharing a meal. This shows your child that a moment of conflict does not have to permanently damage the feeling of love in your home. 

By practising these habits, parents can help to turn moments of conflict into opportunities for growth and healing, reassuring their children that in your family, warmth and love will always have the final word. 

Spiritual Insight 

The Quranic Command for Reconciliation 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Anfaal (8), Verses 1: 

‘…So, seek piety from Allah (Almighty), and correct all matters (in the relationships) between yourselves; and obey Allah (Almighty) and His Prophet (Muhammad ﷺ), if you are true believers.’ 

This verse makes the act of reconciliation a sign of true belief. Parents who are quick to rebuild a sense of warmth after a conflict are not only repairing their family ties, but are also fulfilling a direct command of their faith. 

Prophetic Guidance on Swift Reconciliation 

It is recorded in Al Adab Al Mufrad, Hadith 985, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘It is not lawful for a Muslim to forsake his brother for more than three days, and when they meet, one turns away and the other turns away. The better of the two is the one who begins with the greeting of peace.’ 

This hadith teaches us that ending a conflict swiftly and warmly is an act that is beloved in Islam. When parents are able to model this in their home, their children learn that even after a mistake has been made, love and mercy must be allowed to return quickly. In this way, family life can become a daily training ground in the beautiful arts of turning hurt into harmony, and conflict into compassion.