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What does it really mean to parent with Rahmah (mercy) in everyday life?

Parenting Perspective

Rahmah is a parenting style that prioritizes understanding over presumption, patience over discipline, and compassion over control. It is evident in the way you balance firmness and gentleness, the tone you use, and the grace you provide for errors. Being a merciful parent requires having a foundation of love and empathy while maintaining a firm sense of discipline. It is the way you soothe rather than embarrass, or the way you stop to listen when it would be easier to hurry. Rahmah is not only felt in peaceful situations; it is most potent when your child is having difficulties, and you decide to be compassionate to them despite this.

Spiritual Insight

Mercy is the foundation of the entire Islamic message. With the exception of one, all Surahs begin with ‘Bismillah-ir-Rahman-ir-Raheem.’ Allah Almighty refers to Himself as ‘Ar-Rahman’, the Most Merciful, to all creation, not only the faithful. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Anbiyaa (21), Verse 107: ‘And We (Allah Almighty) did not send you (O Prophet Muhammad ﷺ), except as a mercy for the whole of the trans-universal existence.’ In his interactions with children, the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ exemplified this charity by disciplining them gently without ever making them feel inferior. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 5997, that he said: ‘Whoever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.’ Rahmah parenting is divine strength manifested in human caring, not weakness.

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