What do I say when a child rushes, chokes, and laughs? 

Parenting Perspective 

It can be both frightening and frustrating when a child eats too quickly, begins to cough or choke, and then laughs as though it were a game. Your first instinct might be to scold them out of fear, but calm and clear guidance is far more effective. The goal is to teach them about safety and mindful eating, without turning the mealtime into a power struggle. 

Staying Calm After the Choking Passes 

Once you are sure your child is safe and breathing clearly, it is important to address the situation. Children often laugh in these situations to hide their embarrassment or because they do not yet grasp the seriousness of choking. Instead of snapping at them, keep your tone of voice firm but reassuringly steady. 

• ‘That was a very scary moment for me. Eating too fast can hurt your throat and is not safe.’ 

• ‘Our food is a blessing. We need to eat it slowly and carefully.’ 

Teaching a Simple Safety Rule 

Give your child a clear and memorable rule that you can practise together. You can practise this in a light-hearted way at the start of meals so that they learn the rhythm without feeling ashamed. 

• ‘We always remember our rule: small bites, chew well, then swallow.’ 

Modelling How to Eat Slowly 

Children learn from what they see. A powerful way to teach this is to model it yourself by eating slowly, putting your cutlery down between bites, and chewing carefully. You can even narrate what you are doing in a simple way. 

• ‘I am chewing my food slowly so it can go down into my tummy safely.’ 

Using Natural Consequences 

If the rushing continues despite your reminders, you can pause the meal for a brief moment. This action teaches that unsafe eating leads to a natural pause in the meal, which is a logical consequence, not a punishment. 

• ‘It looks like your body is moving too fast to eat safely. Let us take a one-minute break to calm down. We can continue eating when you are ready to eat slowly.’ 

• Child: (Coughs on food, then laughs) Parent: (Calmly) ‘That made me feel worried. Rushing our food is not safe. Let us practise our rule together: small bite, chew slowly, then swallow. That is how we can enjoy our food without hurting ourselves.’ 

Spiritual Insight 

Eating with care and respect is a fundamental part of Islamic manners (adab). Our tradition consistently discourages haste at mealtimes and encourages moderation and mindfulness instead. 

Eat With Calmness and Respect 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Aa’raaf (7), Verses 31: 

‘ O children of Adam, take (appropriate) measures to beautify yourself (before you appear) at any place of worship (for Prayer); and eat and drink and do not be extravagant (wasteful), as indeed, He (Allah Almighty) does not like extravagance.‘ 

This verse reminds us that the principles of self-control and balance should be applied to all our affairs, including our conduct at the dinner table. 

The Prophet ﷺ on Eating With Care 

It is recorded in Mishkaat Al Masaabih, Hadith 4178, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The food of one man is enough for two, the food of two is enough for four, and the food of four is enough for eight.’ 

While this hadith is about sharing and the blessings in food, scholars explain that it also reflects an attitude of simplicity, moderation, and calmness in one’s approach to eating, rather than one of rushing or overindulgence. 

By calmly guiding your child after a choking incident, you are teaching them that eating is not merely about filling the stomach, but about safety, respect, and gratitude. Over time, they will learn that patience at the table is both healthier for their bodies and closer to the beautiful manners of their faith.