What can my child say when others joke about poverty or housing? 

Parenting Perspective 

Jokes about poverty, housing, or a family’s financial situation can be deeply hurtful. Children may hear comments like, ‘You live in a tiny house,’ or ‘You wear cheap shoes.’ Such remarks can create shame and normalise disrespect. Your role is to equip your child with phrases to respond firmly yet kindly, while also nurturing their compassion for others. 

Equip Your Child with Respectful Scripts 

Give your child short, simple lines that they can easily recall in the moment. These phrases help set a clear boundary without escalating the situation into a confrontation. 

• ‘That is not funny. People’s homes are not a joke.’ 

• ‘Everyone’s family is doing their best. It is not kind to say that.’ 

• ‘We should talk about something else instead.’ 

Cultivate Empathy and Understanding 

Encourage your child to see the human perspective. You can explain, ‘When someone jokes about another person’s home or belongings, it can make them feel small for things they cannot control. True kindness is reminding others that a person’s dignity does not depend on money.’ This helps them understand the emotional impact of such words. 

For example: 

Peer: ‘You live in such a small flat. That is sad.’ 

Child: ‘That is not something to joke about. A home is a special place, no matter its size.’ 

Peer: ‘It was just a joke.’ 

Child: ‘Jokes should not hurt people. Let us talk about football instead.’ 

Practise Responses Through Role-Play 

Role-play different scenarios with your child during calm moments at home. This practice helps the words come more naturally to them when they are under pressure. Reassure them that even if they cannot stop every comment, speaking up once with respectful clarity can make a significant difference. 

Reinforce Dignity and Gratitude at Home 

Children often absorb the attitudes they observe in their parents. Speak with gratitude about your own home and avoid making comparisons with others. Consistently remind your children that character, not possessions, is what makes a person truly valuable. This mindset will strengthen their resilience when they encounter jokes based on materialism. 

By providing your child with respectful words and grounding them in empathy, you empower them to defend dignity without causing further conflict. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches that wealth and housing are not true measures of a person’s worth. Allah Almighty distributes provisions according to His divine wisdom, and mocking others for what they have or lack is a grave violation of human dignity. Teaching children to reject such jokes is an important part of nurturing taqwa (God-consciousness) and compassion. 

The Divine Distribution of Provision 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Zukhruf (43), Verse 32: 

‘Is it they who distribute the mercy of your Sustainer? We (Allah Almighty) distribute between them their livelihood in the worldly life; and We promoted some of them over others in ranks, so that some of them can be of service to each other; and the mercy of your Sustainer is much better than what they accumulate.’ 

This verse is a powerful reminder that all differences in wealth and status are by Allah Almighty’s decree. To mock these circumstances is to show disrespect for His divine plan. When you teach your children to respond with dignity, you are helping them live with this profound awareness. 

The Prophetic Example of Honouring the Poor 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1969, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The one who looks after a widow or a poor person is like a mujahid in the cause of Allah, or like one who prays all the night and fasts all the day.’ 

This hadith illustrates the high spiritual status of caring for those in need. In contrast, mocking the poor is completely contrary to the Prophet’s ﷺ character. Teaching your child to defend another’s dignity with simple words like, ‘That is not funny, every person matters,’ is a practical way for them to embody the Sunnah. 

When your child learns to respond to these situations with clarity and respect, they are shaping their character and faith. They will grow to understand that true honour comes from piety and kindness, not from houses or wealth.