My toddler pulls my phone away mid-use, how do I address the behavior without dismissing their feelings? 

Parenting Perspective 

When a toddler physically takes your phone, their action is rarely about the device itself; it is about reclaiming you. It is one of the clearest ways they can say, ‘I need you right now’. The instinctive reaction might be frustration, but a better approach is to pause and acknowledge the need behind the action. You could say calmly, ‘I can see you really want my attention. Let me finish sending this one message, and then I will be all yours’. Following through quickly is key, as this validates their feelings while gently teaching that your focus sometimes has to be elsewhere for a moment. 

Reflect on the Underlying Need 

It is also worth reflecting on why this behaviour is happening. If it becomes a frequent occurrence, it may be because your child regularly feels they are in competition with your device. To counter this, try building short, predictable tech-free moments into your day, such as five minutes of uninterrupted play before you start work. The goal is not to stop them from ever interrupting, but to fill their ‘attention cup’ so they feel less need to, while still guiding them towards respectful boundaries. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islamic teachings remind us to make both physical and emotional space for our loved ones and to be mindful of the countless distractions that pull us away from what is truly important. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Mujadilah (58), Verse 11: 

‘ O you who are believers, when it is said to you: “Make space for each other in the gatherings”, then try to accommodate each other; (and conversely) Allah (Almighty) shall accommodate you (with His mercy)…‘ 

The command to ‘make space’ is not just about physical gatherings; it is a principle for our hearts. It reminds us to intentionally create emotional and mental room for our children by setting aside our own preoccupations, assuring them of their place in our lives. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 11, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘It is enough of a lie for a man to narrate everything he hears.’ 

While this Hadith is about the dangers of careless speech, its wisdom can be extended to our attention. It serves as a caution against being mindlessly absorbed by every notification and message we receive. Choosing when and how we engage with our devices allows us to give our children the pure, unfiltered connection they need.