I am often short or dismissive with my spouse during stressful moments. Could our child absorb this as a model for communication? 

Parenting Perspective 

Children learn not only from formal lessons but also from tone, timing, and tension. When they frequently observe one parent responding to the other with impatience, eye-rolling, or curtness, particularly during moments of everyday stress, they begin to normalise that rhythm of interaction. Over time, this can become their default model for communication: quick to dismiss, slow to listen. Even without a raised voice or overt disrespect, the emotional sharpness makes an impact, and children internalise it either by copying the behaviour or by becoming fearful of it. 

Stress is an inevitable part of family life; what truly matters is how we carry that stress into our communication. Instead of dismissing your spouse mid-sentence or offering a clipped remark, it is better to take a small pause, breathe, and signal that you need a moment: “I am feeling overloaded right now. Can we please talk in ten minutes?” This action not only preserves dignity in the moment but also demonstrates to your child that emotional regulation is possible, even under pressure. It also models that respect is not something owed only in calm moments, but is especially crucial when tensions are high. 

What Your Child Needs to See 

• That stress is not an excuse to belittle or ignore loved ones. 

• That pauses and repair are integral parts of healthy communication. 

• That kindness is a core value, not a luxury reserved for times of low pressure. 

By adjusting small moments, you recalibrate your home’s emotional tone. Children thrive in spaces where words are not used as weapons—even small, invisible ones. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam does not deny the reality of stress; instead, it repeatedly calls us to an excellence of character in how we express it. Communication is not just a habit—it is a reflection of the state of the heart. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Israa (17), Verses 53: 

‘And informed My servants that they should speak in only the politest manner (when they speak to the extremists in disbelief); indeed, Satan is (always ready for) infusing anarchy between them… ‘

This verse reminds us that even subtle tones of impatience can become tools of division within the home, affecting not just the relationship between spouses but also a child’s emotional world. 

It is recorded in Jami Tirmidhi, Hadith 1977, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The believer does not insult the honor of others, nor curse, nor commit Fahishah, nor is he foul. ‘

Even when under pressure, the Prophet ﷺ upheld gentleness, especially with those closest to him. He did not allow stress to become a license for harshness. Instead, he