How to See Rest as a Responsibility, Not Selfishness 

Parenting Perspective 

Rest Is Maintenance, Not Indulgence 

Many parents, especially mothers, fall into the belief that prioritising their own needs is selfish. This mindset leads to constant giving without replenishment, until exhaustion sets in. What helps is to recognise that rest is not indulgence; it is maintenance. Just as food and water sustain your body, moments of rest sustain your ability to parent with patience, warmth, and presence. 

Model That Self-Care Is Part of Family Care 

Children need to see that their parents are human beings with limits. If you always push through without pause, they may grow up believing that love requires silent self-erasure. Instead, by modelling balance, you teach them that caring for yourself is part of caring for your family. A parent who takes time to rest is not withdrawing from their children, but ensuring they can return to them with steadiness and energy. 

Make Rest a Normal Part of Your Routine 

One practical shift is to treat rest as part of your family’s routine, not as something squeezed in with guilt. You might say, “I am going to sit quietly for ten minutes so I have more energy for us later.” This communicates to your children that your needs matter and that rest is purposeful, not selfish. Over time, it sets an example that self-care is normal and necessary. 

Rest Is an Investment in Your Parenting 

Also remind yourself that asking for help, or stepping back briefly, is an act of responsibility. It protects your wellbeing and ensures your children experience you at your best, rather than receiving the drained version of you. Rest, in this sense, is an investment in your role as a parent. 

Spiritual Insight 

Caring for Yourself Is a Trust From Allah 

Islam teaches balance and fairness, not endless self-sacrifice at the cost of health. Caring for yourself is not only allowed, but required, because your body and soul are trusts given to you by Allah. 

Resting Within Your Limits Is Obedience 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 286: 

‘Allah (Almighty) does not place any burden on any human being except that which is within his capacity...’  

This Verse reminds you that Allah recognises your limits. Choosing to rest within those limits is not weakness, but obedience to the mercy and balance Allah has placed in His religion. 

Fulfilling the Rights of Your Body Is a Duty 

It is recorded in Sahih Al Bukhari that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Your body has a right over you, your eyes have a right over you, and your wife has a right over you.’  

[Sahih Al-Bukhari, 67:133] 

This Hadith makes clear that fulfilling the rights of your body is a duty, not an option. Neglecting rest is neglecting those rights, while honouring them is part of fulfilling your trust before Allah. 

When you view rest through this lens, you will see it not as selfishness but as responsibility. By maintaining yourself, you uphold your duty to Allah and give your children a healthier, more present parent. This balance is the true strength, and it aligns your parenting with both emotional wisdom and Islamic guidance.