How to Reconnect With Your Kids When You Feel Numb 

Parenting Perspective 

Numbness Is a Response to Sustained Pressure 

Feeling emotionally numb after years of carrying the parenting responsibilities alone is a deeply human response to sustained pressure and exhaustion. It is important to acknowledge that this numbness is not a failure but a sign that your emotional reserves need replenishing. To reconnect with your children, the first step is to give yourself permission to recognise and name these feelings without judgement. You cannot pour from an empty cup, so caring for your own emotional wellbeing is not selfish but essential for your family’s health. 

Create Small Moments of Intentional Presence 

Start by creating small moments of intentional presence with your children, even if it feels difficult at first. This might mean setting aside just ten minutes each day to engage in a calm activity that you all enjoy, such as reading, drawing, or simply sitting together without distractions. These small, consistent interactions build a foundation of warmth that can gradually dissolve the numbness. 

Pause and Identify the Source of Resentment 

When resentment arises, try to pause and identify its source. Is it exhaustion, unmet needs, or a longing for recognition? Once you understand what you are feeling, it becomes easier to manage those emotions rather than letting them spill over unintentionally. You might find it helpful to communicate honestly, age-appropriately, to your children about how you feel, framing it in a way that teaches emotional honesty and responsibility without placing blame. 

Seek Support and Lean on Dua 

Seek support where possible, whether from your spouse, extended family, or trusted community members. Sharing the load in any way helps lessen the emotional burden. Additionally, consider moments of dua and reflection, asking Allah Almighty for strength and ease in your role as a parent. This spiritual practice can provide comfort and resilience when emotional fatigue feels overwhelming. 

Focus on Compassionate Presence, Not Perfection 

Reconnection is a process, not an instant fix. Be gentle with yourself and your children as you rebuild emotional ties, focusing on steady, compassionate presence rather than perfection. 

Spiritual Insight 

With Hardship Comes Ease 

Islam recognises the reality of human emotional struggle and offers guidance for patience and self-care in difficult times. Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Inshirah (94), Verses 5–6: 

‘Thus with (every) hardship there is facilitation (from Allah Almighty). Indeed, with (every) hardship there is facilitation (from Allah Almighty).’ 

This repetition reassures that relief and ease follow difficulties, encouraging patience and hope in challenging moments of parenting. 

Seek Help From Allah and Do Not Give Up 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Book 1, Hadith 79, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer, while there is good in both. Strive for that which will benefit you, seek help from Allah, and do not give up.’ 

This hadith highlights the importance of seeking support and strength without surrendering to despair. Islam encourages you to maintain your resilience by seeking help from Allah and recognising your limits. 

By reconnecting with your children through patience, presence, and prayer, you are fulfilling your role as a compassionate parent while nurturing your own soul. This balance allows you to move beyond numbness towards a renewed bond grounded in love and spiritual strength. In reconnecting with your children, remember that your honest efforts and sincere dua are seen and valued both by your family and by Allah Almighty. This is the foundation for healing and renewed closeness.