How to Raise an Emotionally Intelligent Child While Still Learning 

Parenting Perspective 

It is entirely possible to raise an emotionally aware child while you are still learning emotional regulation yourself, in fact, that honest journey may be the most powerful example you offer. 

Emotional Responsibility in Action 

A parent does not need to be emotionally perfect. What matters more is that you are emotionally present and striving. Children benefit not from flawlessness, but from seeing emotional responsibility in action. That means you name your feelings appropriately, recover from moments of overwhelm with accountability, and try again with sincerity. For example, saying ‘I was feeling frustrated earlier, and I raised my voice. That was not right, and I am sorry,’ gives a child language, repair, and clarity, all essential parts of emotional intelligence. 

Model Small, Specific Steps 

You can also model small, specific steps. If you feel your emotions rising, speak it aloud gently: ‘I need a moment to think, then we will talk.’ Let your child see you pause and take that breath. These moments teach far more than complex lessons. They say, ‘Even adults feel big things, but we can still choose our response.’ 

Remember that this work is not about eliminating emotion, it is about relating to it wisely. As you learn that, you are already teaching it. 

Spiritual Insight 

The noble Quran validates emotion as a real part of the human experience, yet it constantly reminds us to seek regulation, perspective, and purpose in how we respond. 

A Reminder That Emotional Regulation is a Spiritual Virtue 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Aalai Imran (3), verses 133–134: 

‘And compete to seek forgiveness from your Sustainer, and to the Gardens (of Paradise) the width of which (is equivalent to) the layers of trans-universal existence and the Earth.… Those (the believers are the ones) that spend (in the way of Allah Almighty) in times of abundance and hardship; they suppress their anger; and are forgiving to people; and Allah (Almighty) loves those who are benevolent.’ ‘

This Verse honours emotional regulation as a spiritual virtue, not as repression, but as a deliberate act of goodness. Restraining anger, not erasing it. Pardon, not passivity. 

The Prophetic Model: Strength Lies in Inner Work 

It is recorded in Muttawa Malik that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The strong person is not the one who throws his adversaries to the ground. The strong person is the one who contains himself when angry.‘

[Muttawa Malik, 47:12] 

This Prophetic teaching affirms that strength lies in the inner work, and what you are attempting with your child is exactly that. You are cultivating strength with softness, discipline with compassion, and emotion with wisdom. May Allah reward every silent struggle and make your striving a source of light for your child and peace for yourself.